What I Hear When You Say

Whenever I hear someone say, Hey, Im not a feminist, all I can think of is, someone hurt you didnt they? Someone said that you were gross, or that you were mean, or that youre a bully, or that you hate men, or that youre unhappy, or that you dont shave your legs.

If you believe that men and women should be equal in any sense then you are a feminist.

[MUSIC] The thing is that a lot of times people dont even realize how much the culture is dominated by men.

I know speaking for me - I can spend so much of my time obsessing about boys.

Is this guy calling me back?

Whats this email mean?

He ordered octopus, does that mean he likes me?

All these things and I will find myself texting my girlfriends about this all the time.

And then Im like - were not talking about anything outside of dating a guy.

And that is an example of, you know, how the culture can take over and not realizing that.

And then we see that in movies and books.

In something like Sex and the City, which is a show I loved but they talked about this a lot and at one point Miranda was like, All we do is talk about men, what about us? And so I think with The Bechdel Test, its great for movies to kind of show, hm, oh wait, these two women are only talking about Colin Firth. I mean, I can talk about him all day.

Dont get me wrong.

But, in a movie, thats all theyre talking about.

They dont have any hopes, dreams and desires.

Then that shows that the world just kind of revolves around men and thats not true.

Women have a lot of things they think about outside of dating.

Outside of, like, making sure their male boss is okay.

And so I think you reflect that more and I think The Bechdel Test has really shed a light on that in a really positive way, despite some patrollers who hate it.

Good.

Im glad you hate it; its making you think.

Thinking hurts your brain?

Your problem.

When I hear when someone says that they are not a feminist, I hear someone who doesnt know what that word means.

Right, if you believe that your mother and your daughter should have equal opportunities and rights as men then you are a feminist.

How can you not be a feminist?

And I know thats coming from a place where people are not aware of what the meaning of feminist is.

And they create a sort of persona about what a feminist is and make it an extremely negative stereotype.

When I hear that, it to me, its sad because it indicates how mainstream can take something, a movement like that, and they can make it into something thats negative.

But in reality, a feminist is a person who believes in equality between the sexes.

Between men and women.

It is not something that says women are superior to men, or men to have to be diminished in any way.

Its saying that there should be equality between the sexes, socially, culturally, politically across the board.

The Bechdel test is a litmus test thats used to measure the presence of women within a work of fiction.

Basically what its looking for is three types of criteria.

It should have at least two women in it.

The two women should be named.

And they should have a conversation with each other that does not involve a man.

It actually is pretty strict and a lot of works do not actually meet the litmus test.

People talk about it most often in terms of film.

People have been using it to measure the most popular films that have come out within the last ten years and its a pretty stark reality that a huge percentage of films do not meet The Bechdel test.

Everybody has this idea of what a feminist should look like or act like: abrasive, man-hating.

But thats not how feminists actually are.

Its just how its portrayed in the media.

If a young girl told me she wasnt a feminist, Id say thats cool, you can come to it in your own time.

But I guarantee if you really knew what feminism was all about, you would change your mind.

Im Kristen Korvette.

Im the founder and editrix of Slutist.

And I also teach Gender Studies at the New School.

Slut is a word that has been used to police and punish women for decades and at Slutist we want to reclaim that and reclaim the feminine power within it.

And its really a place where you can all come together and have disparate viewpoints about feminism and living a feminist life.

My last event, Legacy of the Witch looked into the ways the word slut and the word witch have been used to police female sexuality.

I expect someone to come in, see a lot of empowered nudity, avant-garde art, radical performances, and leave with a sense of community.

I wish I had been told at twelve years old that my virginity didnt define me.

That I wasnt a whore if I was interested in exploring my sexuality.

And that it didnt decrease my value as a person, nor did it define me as a person.

We need feminism because there is so much more work to be done.

Particularly within mainstream feminism where white, rich feminists still have this say about what feminism is and what the issues are that rise to the top.

My feminism will be different from your feminism because everyone comes from a different place, from a different lived experience.

I look at that as intersectional feminism, which means that there are intersecting forms of oppression, that everyone is going to experience the world in a different way based upon race, and class, and cultural background, and ability.

The one thing feminism can do is unite people from these disparate backgrounds in the shared goal of gender equality.

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