Are y'all ready for your headliner of the night?
[Cheering and applause] Jesus, voice-over: Do you get nervous at all?
Vanessa, voice-over: I get nervous, but it's almost like the nerves almost give you that, like, fire.
Man: You've seen her on HBO.
You've seen her on Comedy Central.
Vanessa: As soon as it's go time... Man: Vanessa... Vanessa: the light hits, they call your name, you kind of have to jump off the cliff.
Gonzalez!
Vanessa: Let's go!
[Cheering and applause] What up?
Qu onda, Laredo?
Puro 956!
Yeah.
I love being back home.
It's crazy to me.
Jesus was asking me-- he was, like, "You're not nervous any exes are gonna come?"
And I said, "I don't have any exes "in Laredo, thank God.
"Everybody I know that has an ex in Laredo also has restraining orders."
Estn psychos aqu.
My dad was a canine officer at Customs... [Cheering and applause] and I would ask my mom, "Mom, Mom, what bridge is Dad working at tonight?
No, no.
I just want to send him prayers."
Que pesque muchas drogas.
S.
And she would be like, "Oh, Bridge Two."
And I'd be like... " rale, Vicki, Bridge One."
[Laughter] And every weekend, we would go across.
Mesa, mesa Mesa que ms aplauda, mesa que ms aplauda Za, za, za, y a tu za, y a tu za [Cheering and applause] Yeah, 15 years old.
Con las falditas.
... all out, ready to get abducted... [Laughter] but even the cartel was like... "No, esas no".
[Laughter]
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