30-Minute Music Hour

WELL, I'M BUSY NOT CRYING AND I'M TOO TIED UP TO CARE NOW, THINKING ABOUT HER IS A 24-HOUR AFFAIR I CAN'T WEEP AND I CAN'T WORRY MY WHOLE LIFE JUST A HUSTLE AND HURRY BUSY NOT CRYING OVER SOMEBODY THAT AIN'T THERE It's the 30 Minute Music Hour. I'm Andy Moore. That's Robbie Fulks! WELL I'M MOVING EACH DAY AT A MIGHTY QUICK PACE BUT MY HEART STAYS IN THE SAME SAD PLACE NOTHING THAT HEAVY IS GONNA EVER CATCH UP TO ME IT TAKES ALL THE FUEL I CAN FIT IN MY CAR TO RIDE AROUND THE SPOTS WHERE THE MEMORIES ARE IT'S A FULL-BLOWN CHORE OVER- LOOKING WHAT'S PLAIN TO SEE I'M BUSY NOT CRYING AND I'M TOO TIED UP TO CARE THINKING ABOUT HER IS A 24-HOUR AFFAIR YEAH, I CAN'T WEEP AND I CAN'T WORRY MY WHOLE LIFE JUST A HUSTLE AND HURRY BUSY NOT CRYING OVER SOMEBODY THAT AIN'T THERE I SAID I'M BUSY NOT CRYING OVER SOMEBODY THAT AIN'T THERE IF THOSE LIGHTS ONCE SPELLED A WORD IT WASN'T HILTON THE TV'S DEAD THE BOX SPRING IS NEARLY GONE BUT IT'S THE BEST DEAL YOU COULD FIND FOR JUST $40.99 LORD, IT'S ALL YOU CAN CHEAT ALL NIGHT LONG ALL YOU CAN FOOL AROUND WITH A SHADE PULLED TIGHTLY DOWN WHERE NO ONE CAN SEE US WHO'S TO SAY WE'RE WRONG ONLY FOUR WALLS AND A BED BUT IT GETS OUR BODIES FED AND IT'S ALL YOU CAN CHEAT ALL NIGHT LONG BLACK HOSE HUNG BY THE MIRROR BOTTLE OF CHEAP MERLOT ON THE TABLE THAT I REACH FOR WHEN I FEEL THE GUILT GROW STRONG THEN A HAND FALLS SOFT AND KIND AND A CRAVING DROWNS MY MIND GOD, IT'S ALL YOU CAN CHEAT ALL NIGHT LONG ALL YOU CAN FOOL AROUND WITH THE SHADE PULLED TIGHTLY DOWN YES, AND WAKE UP CALL TO GET US HOME BY DAWN THEN YOU'LL SWEAR THIS IS THE END BUT YOU KNOW NEXT WEEK WE'LL MEET AGAIN WHERE IT'S ALL YOU CAN CHEAT ALL NIGHT LONG Two songs. Two gorgeous songs. Andy, what a song to sing in front of my son, there, on the set here. Where is Preston? There he is. And he's not even doing his homework anymore. Alex, swing back around there. That young man, that smiling, gorgeous child had to listen to that grubby, nasty, sinful... He looks traumatized. He's in shock. All right, get the camera off of him; That's enough time. That's enough. That's a milk carton shot, there. ( Robbie laughs ) How are we doing? Are we doing okay so far? Are we doing okay on time? Am I done? Is that a wrap? I think we're over. - We're done. Yeah. > Wow, all that driving. Yeah, in that old van. Yeah, well, the church group's got to get around somehow. Well, you're the second most famous person in your family this week, because your son's on TV, right? How's that going? What's the show and all that? Yeah, his thing isn't streaming live, though, I've got to point out and this thing has got that beat in that particular regard, but other than that, he's got us beat, because on CBS TV on The Amazing Race. Right. - Can we say that on Public TV? CBS? I don't think this show will be on against it, so. Or perhaps at all. It might be the Three Tenors. - Right, right. They're going to put the Three Tenors on, instead of this. Yeah, yeah. But it's already been on three times today. So, Nicolas, your son, and your father-in-law, got it all worked out. And there's only one or two weeks left. It'll probably be done by the time people see this. But, has he enjoyed that? Are you proud? Yeah, well he, you know, it's this big secret what happened on the show. And it taped last summer. He knows who won. And whether he won or not, I don't know. Sure, you do. - I do not know. But each week, he's very scrupulous about revealing to me, week by week, what happened that week and what he was feeling, what he was going through, what happened that wasn't seen on cameras. But never a week ahead. He always sticks with the show. And family travel as he was growing up trained him for this? You guys did that kind of international-- No. Well, he's a pilot. We never traveled too much. One trip around the country when he was a kid. But since he's gotten to be a pilot for American, he goes all over. - Is that what he does? Yeah, that hasn't necessarily helped him on the show, because it seems like he still has trouble like ordering tickets through like the commoners that staff the ticket counters at airlines, is so some trouble, sometimes. That seems to be the common clave behind the counter. Yeah, like intense situations, like you and me talking here, you know. So, I'd be wanting something from you. Well, how about I want some more music. Can you provide that? - You turned it around on me. Whatever, okay, a couple more. Just a couple more. Two more here. Then, I'm going to bother you in a couple more. Come on back. You know I'm always here. All right. - I'm not going anywhere. Preston's comfortable. He's hunkering down. Yeah, Preston knows this song pretty well. He knows the sentiment behind it, as well as the actual song itself. ( tuning guitar ) This is a little tune. You know, it's the presidential season. And we actually do have kind of a well-known Libertarian fellow running for president this time around. And that would be Ron Paul. And I think-- Which I don't say to, like, publicize or endorse him, or anything else. I'm just tuning the guitar and making small talk. But this song has a bit of a Libertarian sentiment, I guess a streak of that, leave me alone type sentiment in it. In fact it's called, "I Like Being Left Alone." Here it goes. I LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE I LIKE CHOCOLATE PIE A CLEAR BLUE SKY AND A GLASS OF Ctes du Rhne I LIKE SUMMER I LIKE FALL I LIKE MUSIC BUT MOST OF ALL I LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE I'M TALKING ABOUT SALES REPS I'M TALKING ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT I'M TALKING ABOUT THE CHILDREN AND I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU, YOU, YOU MY TIME'S LIKE A SWEET PLUM MAN, EVERYBODY WANTS SOME I'D RATHER BE LONESOME I'D RATHER BE BLUE I LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE KEEP ME WELL AWAY FROM THE P.D.A. THE TRAFFIC AND THE TELEPHONE I DON'T CARE HOW LITTLE HOW MUCH I EARN IF I CAN GET ONE THING IN RETURN I JUST LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE GO AWAY WE DON'T HAVE TO SIT AND HOLD HANDS OH, YOU ALREADY GOT THE GOLD BAND YOU SAY I'M TALKING LIKE AN OLD MAN AND MAYBE THAT'S TRUE BUT WHAT'S THE HARM TO SIT AND THINK SOME AT WORST A LITTLE WISDOM YOU CAN PAINT THE TOWN CRIMSON I'LL JUST STAY BLUE I LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE I LIKE CHOCOLATE PIE A CLEAR BLUE SKY AND A GLASS OF Ctes du Rhne YEAH, I LIKE WATER I LIKE AIR I LIKE SPACE BUT NOT TO SHARE I LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE YEAH, I LIKE SUMMER I LIKE FALL BUT THE THING THAT THRILLS ME MOST OF ALL I LIKE BEING LEFT ALONE Oh, man, that was really a weepy little ballad, wasn't it? Let's pick the pace back up here a little bit. In case you're tuning in late, you might be wondering what a guy's doing sitting all by himself on TV, like you know, the studio was left open, I snuck in here and everybody's gone home. And you know, this is one of those kind of SCTV moments where somebody took over the levers of television power and that is essentially what's happened. Because I'm really alone on the set here, talking to no one. There's no one here. And anything can happen. My name is Robbie Fulks. ( tuning guitar ) And you wouldn't know it, but this is what I do for a living here, what I'm doing right now. And I'm going to sing a song about the great lost art of cigarette smoking. Did cigarette smoking pretty much go the way of pederasty here in Wisconsin? Is that illegal now, pretty much? Is it gone now? Is it no more? Beloit, all right. My good friend, Andy Moore, over there, who just slandered a whole people, a whole town. But we're safely out of television range of Beloit, Wisconsin, so it's a free for all, ladies and gentlemen. This song is called, "I Hate Beloit." I HATE BELOIT I HATE BELOIT CAUSE THE PEOPLE THERE SUCK SO BAD OH, I HATE BELOIT I HATE BELOIT IT'S THE BEST-- IT'S THE WORST TOWN GOD EVER HAD It's not really a song. I would've spent a little-- Would have come up with some better rhymes than that. If I was versed by the producers on what was going to transpire here on the show. But anyway, I do have a song that I wrote in advance, that I brought especially for our listening audience today. It's a song about the great state of North Carolina. North Carolina is the cigarette state. WELL JUST BEYOND VIRGINIA'S SOUTHERN BORDER IS A LAND THAT I AM HAPPY TO CALL MINE AND I WAS RAISED IN A HOUSE OF BRICK AND MORTAR IN THE GREAT CLAY HILLS OF CENTRAL CAROLINA NOW THE CORN CROP THERE IS HARDLY WORTH A MENTION AND THE CATTLE FARMS ARE FINE BUT NOT THE BEST IT'S JUST A LITTLE LEAF WE BORROWED FROM THE INJUNS THAT KEEPS OUR STATE A NOTCH ABOVE THE REST THAT GEORGIA PEACH IS FAIR KENTUCKY BEYOND COMPARE ALABAMA'S GRAND THE STATE, NOT THE BAND YOU KNOW THE SOUTH SHE HAS HER DIAMONDS AND EVERYONE IS GREAT BUT NORTH CAROLINA IS THE CIGARETTE STATE FOLKS IN OUR HOMETOWN SURE HAD THE HABIT THEY'D SMOKE THE BEST HOME GROWN THE WHOLE YEAR ROUND THEY KNEW WHAT A GOOD TIME WAS AND HOW TO HAVE IT 'CAUSE THAT WAS A CIGARETTE TOWN OUR NEIGHBOR FRANK WAS NO HIGH BRED MAN OF LETTERS BUT HE MADE AN HONEST LIVING OFF THE LAND AND HE PUT AWAY THREE PACKS A DAY OR BETTER BECAUSE HE WAS A CIGARETTE MAN GEORGIA'S PEACH IS FAIR KENTUCKY BEYOND COMPARE AND ALABAMA'S GRAND THE STATE, NOT THE BAND WELL, THE SOUTH SHE HAS HER DIAMONDS AND EVERYONE IS GREAT BUT NORTH CAROLINA IS THE CIGARETTE STATE ROBBIE! I TOOK UP WITH A PRETTY THING FROM ASHVILLE I LOVED HER MORE THAN LIFE I TOLD HER SO AND SHE TOOK BETWEEN HER FINGERS NICE NATURAL AND SMOKED IT TO THE FILTER LIKE A PRO SO I GAVE HER A RING AND FROM HER PA I SWIPED HER SHE GAVE ME A BOY I'M HAPPY TO CALL MINE CHAIN SMOKES KOOLS AND NOT YET OUT OF DIAPERS IN A RED BRICK HOUSE IN CENTRAL CAROLINA NOW GEORGIA'S PEACH IS FAIR KENTUCKY BEYOND COMPARE ALABAMA'S GRAND THE STATE, NOT THE BAND WELL, THE SOUTH SHE HAS HER DIAMONDS AND EVERYONE IS GREAT BUT NORTH CAROLINA IS THE CIGARETTE STATE AND NORTH CAROLIN IS THE CIGARETTE STATE ANDY MOORE COME OVER AND TALK TO ME NOW BELOIT IS THE CIGARETTE TOWN Oh, we're going to be in big trouble over that Beloit thing. You know where Beloit is, don't you? Oh, boy. We're going to be in big trouble. Beloit is near Janesville, isn't it? Right. Yeah, those are my people down there. That's what we want to hear. And what else? I'm not one of you. I'm not in this tea and cracker, pinky raised set up here in Wisconsin. Those are like the commoners. That's my stock down there in Beloit. What else does your dad do that's fun and good, other than play guitar? What else is he good at? Um... - A long pause. I can't think of much offhand. ( laughter ) Making cereal? - Serial murders. He's good at telling jokes, isn't he? Yeah, he's pretty good at that. I'm going to ask him a kiss-up question. Do you know what a kiss-up question is? No. Well, it means you want to give somebody a kiss so that they'll be impressed with your question, or give you a good answer. But, the kiss-up question. The 30 Minute Music Hour kiss-up question. It's Kiss-up Question . You've got to have like a theme for this feature. Yeah, we can't afford Letterman's band. Guitar picker, songwriter, singer. And all your fans debate about how much they like one of those. Which do you enjoy doing the most? Which do you want to be known for? Well, I'd like to be known for my driving, actually. All the things that I do related to music, I've been driving, you know, for 30 years. And I've never had an accident. I always get the van and the band, and in this case, my son, there safely. And I think that's my finest accomplishment. After that, I would say that writing-- I'm best at writing songs. I feel like I can write songs in different styles, whereas I can only kind of sing the way I sing. So I feel more powerful for some reason as a writer. You seem to know his set list. When he went into "North Carolina is a Cigarette State," I saw you go like this. - Yeah. Which is your favorite song of all the ones your dad does? I don't know. I love his song, "Let's Kill Saturday Night." Oh! - Because it's kind of-- I'm not exactly sure why I like it, but I like rock, and he's country. And that song's kind of half rock and half country, and I really like that. Does he need a wireless kit or something? Can we hear him, what he's saying? Just barely. - Oh, gotcha. He said that he likes rock and country. But that song rocks more than some of the other country songs, right? Yeah. Did we hear most of that, Steve?

Steve Doebel on PA

We sure did. Oh, good. I don't know. That seems to me like an inevitable lead in to "Let's Kill Saturday Night." Seems like I almost have to play it now, doesn't it? It does. But it's not on your Ticonderoga pencil set list there, though, is it? You want to write it in there, Preston? Sure. - Pencil on the set! Yeah. I think we kind of walked you right into this. That's all right. > It's a conspiracy. But now it's going to be official. Of all the songs he could've put down. Preston, you've also got to cross off one that was on the list. Which one? - I don't know, surprise me. We can point out-- Now that you've embarrassed me by pointing out the fact that I have a list of like six titles down there, that I would have done this without a list. But for some reason, when we figured that I needed to stick with the same six, that I just wanted to jog my brain. But normally, I would've come in here and just sung, right? About Beloit, or something. - Yeah. Well, all right. Let's make sure we spell every word right, or you get a big spanking when you get home. From corporal Fulks. ( laughter ) Which one did you cross off? He crossed off the incredibly moving slow ballad... I love Beloit. It moves at about two beats per minute, "In Bristol Town One Bright Day." Yeah, in Beloit one bright day. All right, well let's go. Let's get out of here. We'll do two more. We'll do this one and another one. Then we'll do some credits. - That sounds good. And both of these are in D, so I'll probably just make them one song, more or less. All right. Thanks, Robbie. You bet, Andy. THIS FIRST ONE IS A REQUEST OF MY SON PRESTON TEN YEARS OLD WELL A DOLLAR I MAKE IS A BUCK I OWE AND A 40-HOUR WEEK LEAVES 10 TO BLOW OH, BUT EVERY GAME IN THIS TOWN IS JUST A NICKEL-AND-DIME WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN IT FEELS LIKE THE LAST TIME DOWN THE MAIN DRAG WE RIDE WITH THE ENGINES OPEN IF THERE'S A FIRE INSIDE THAT'S THE ONE THING GOING I'VE GOT THE MUSTANG LOADED I'VE GOT A WRONG TO RIGHT I'VE GOT A LITTLE RED BULLET LET'S KILL SATURDAY NIGHT KNOCK IT OUT OF ITS MISERY NAIL THAT COFFIN TIGHT HIGH LIVING THAT'S HISTORY LET'S KILL SATURDAY NIGHT THE LITTLE MAN'S LOT THAT'S A PRINCE'S LIFE A PRINCE WITH A LOUSY JOB A PRINCE WITH A WORKING WIFE SOMETHING IN THE BIG FRAME MOVED IT NEVER WAS SO HARD TO KEEP A 20-INCH TUBE AND A FENCED-IN YARD OH, BUT GIVE ME ONE NIGHT WITH THE MOON HIGH AND THE RADIO POUNDING AND, BROTHER THIS TOWN IS GONNA GO DOWN KICKING AND SHOUTING I'VE GOT THE MUSTANG LOADED I'VE GOT A WRONG TO RIGHT I'VE GOT A LITTLE RED BULLET LET'S KILL SATURDAY NIGHT KNOCK IT OUT OF ITS MISERY NAIL THAT COFFIN TIGHT HIGH LIVING THAT'S HISTORY LET'S KILL SATURDAY NIGHT JUST GIVE ME ONE NIGHT WITH THE MOON HIGH AND THE RADIO POUNDING AND BROTHER THIS TOWN IS GONNA GO DOWN KICKING AND SHOUTING I'VE GOT THE MUSTANG LOADED I'VE GOT A WRONG TO RIGHT I'VE GOT A LITTLE RED BULLET LET'S KILL SATURDAY NIGHT KNOCK IT OUT OF ITS MISERY NAIL THAT COFFIN TIGHT HIGH LIVING THAT'S HISTORY LET'S KILL SATURDAY NIGHT SHE'S GOT A TEMPER LIKE A TEXAS STORM MY WILL'S STRONG AS BRICK SOMETIMES WHEN WE WANNA GET ALONG WE BOTH GOTTA GET APART QUICK WELL, WE'D TAKE OUR TROUBLES ON THE TOWN TO MEND BUT THE TOWN'S TOO SMALL FOR THAT SO WE TAKE OUR STOOLS AND WE JUST PRETEND WE DON'T KNOW WHERE THE OTHER ONE'S AT PARALLEL BARS ONE AT MY FEET ONE ON THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE STREET WHERE TWO HEARTS THAT JUST CAN'T MEET HIDE 'TIL THE HEARTACHE'S GONE WE HAD WORDS WE LET FLY SHE TOOK THE LOW ROAD AND SO DID I STRAIGHT DOWNTOWN NOW HERE WE ARE WORKING IT OUT IN PARALLEL BARS YEAH, YEAH, YEAH WELL, DON'T THINK I'M NOT THINKING 'BOUT YOUR SWEET FACE AS I KNOCK THIS 8-BALL 'ROUND BECAUSE I'M ACROSS MAIN GETTIN' YOURS ERASED EVERY HIGHBALL I KNOCK DOWN BUT ABOUT MIDNIGHT WHEN THE STORM HAS BLOWN AND THE BEER'S WORN DOWN OUR PRIDE WE'RE GONNA BE MAKIN' TRACKS BACK HOME AND MAKIN' UP SIDE BY SIDE PARALLEL BARS ONE AT MY FEET ONE ON THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE STREET WHERE TWO HEARTS THAT JUST CAN'T MEET HIDE 'TIL THE HEARTACHE'S GONE WE HAD WORDS WE LET FLY SHE TOOK THE LOW ROAD AND SO DID I STRAIGHT DOWNTOWN NOW HERE WE ARE WORKING IT OUT IN PARALLEL BARS WE'LL GO CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY HERE ON THE HALF-HOUR 60-MINUTE MUSIC SPECIAL GOOD TIME HOUR OH, ROBBIE FULKS SINGING YOU A SONG RIGHT NOW THAT ANDY MOORE WANTED ANDY MOORE WANTED TO HEAR THIS SONG SO I PLAYED THIS SONG NOW THE HOUR IS DONE BUT IT REALLY WASN'T AN HOUR IT WAS MORE LIKE A HALF-HOUR I DROVE HERE ALL THE WAY FROM MY HOME NOW I GOTTA GO 'CAUSE THE SHOW IS OVER ROBBIE FULKS ROBBIE FULKS CAN'T STAY SOBER FOR LONG BECAUSE IT'S SIX O'CLOCK SIX SEVEN O'CLOCK NOW AND I GOTTA GO TO A BAR DOWNTOWN GOTTA GET A DRINK GONE AND THE SHOW IS GONE THAT'S THE SHOW FOLKS TURN OFF YOUR SET NOW I AIN'T GONNA PLAY ANY MORE Unless you want me to... THEN I'LL GO ON A LITTLE LONGER PARALLEL BARS WE'LL GO CRAZY BUT WE WON'T GO FAR WE WORKED IT OUT IN PARALLEL BARS YEAH! HEY! WHOA!