Victorious Blog, Season 2: Entente Cordiale

January 29, 2018 Jonna Mayberry Leave a Comment

This is part of the Victorious Blog series. Click here to read the series.

Previously on Victoria: Everything went horribly wrong and we vowed to not let them toy with our emotions again. But we came back to watch more, didn’t we? Of course we did.

If you missed “Entente Cordiale,” you can watch Victoria on-demand, anytime on our website by clicking here.  Continue below to relive this week’s episode. (Spoiler alert!)

Pack Your (Dash-Themed Embroidered) Bags

The episode opens with some heated conversations. The French – namely King Louis Philippe – are sniffing around the young Isabella of Spain, and no one in the palace is happy about it. An alliance between France and Spain would disturb Victoria’s queenly plans.

Besides, Louis’ son isn’t the only eligible bachelor around! Uncle Leopold, as a certified professional uncle, has a nephew who would be just perfect for the role.

Victoria contemplates writing a letter to discourage the match, but is advised that such a move might come off as “a Coburg conspiracy.” And while that sounds pretty darn cool to us, Albert doesn’t think so.

Speaking of Albert: The next scene involves him sitting around sketching his own portrait in a dimly lit room. But once he’s halfway done, he flips out because he looks like Leopold, so he purposely dumps ink all over the sketch. Nothing says opulence like being able to spill AN ENTIRE JAR OF INK on your half-done portrait when you get fussy. In our world, you just sigh and crumple it up.

Instead of writing a letter to discourage a French-Spanish match, Victoria decides to visit Louis Philippe. And Albert will join! They hope the trip to France will revive his spirits.

Now, the only thing to do is decide whether to pack the purple silk or the white organza. And don’t forget the Dash embroidered bag!

Duchess of Buccleuch: “France is a godless country!”
Victoria: “Then you must bring your Bible!”

Vacation in Sodom and Gomorrah

Albert’s sorta-father may have had a woman at every port,  but Albert is not a good sailor. As soon as they board the ship, he starts getting seasick.

Writer and producer Daisy Goodwin confirmed that the seasick scene is based on fact:

Luckily for Albert, their ship – conveniently named HMY Victoria & Albert – eventually reaches shore. And Louis Philippe, France’s comic relief, is there to greet them. He exchanges some jokes with Victoria and we learn that Albert is not good at networking. Get this man some icebreakers!

As the Duchess of Buccleuch expected, France is a virtual hellscape of double-cheek kisses, oddly shaped bread and cleavage makeup.

“Kissed on both cheeks. As if she were a washerwoman!” she scoffs in the carriage to the chateau, as the rest of the staff exchange knowing glances. “And to think I told your mother I would look after you! And here we are, in Sodom and Gomorrah!”

Upon arrival, Victoria notices that the ladies in waiting are whispering about her.  “A dog on the clutch bag; can you IMAGINE?” one scoffs as Victoria walks by. (There’s a lot of scoffing all around.)

Victoria notices that everyone around her is caked in makeup, so she thinks they’re whispering about her lack of rouge. She requests some makeup from Miss Skerrett to fix her very English problem. Meanwhile, Albert’s just now noticing that the ladies are painted, and he’s as horrified as the Duchess. Wait till he sees Victoria!

Victoria’s routine takes a little longer with the addition of a makeup regimen, but she still makes it downstairs in time for dinner… just in time to horrify Albert with her rosy cheeks.

Naturally, she tries to talk to Louis about Isabella, but Louis is not having it. Because in France, he explains, they don’t mix business with pleasure. And in France, pleasure means …


That’s right, folks! Grab your white napkin to “hide your face from God” and crunch into this local delicacy. This part of the episode is also completely based on fact. You can read more about ortolans, and the other true facts from this episode, here.

The Horrors of France, Part 2: Outdoors Edition

The next day, it’s time to head outdoors. Victoria visits the garden of our dreams with Louis Philippe. Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?

But garden talk turns intense when Louis insinuates Victoria was simply “snapped up” by Albert in an effort to construct a Coburg empire.






Meanwhile, on Louis’ gorgeous lawn, Ernest is behaving just like his late father by lounging around with the ladies. But he says it’s OK because he’s just honoring his father’s memory.

And the Duchess of Buccleuch is yelling at the French staff. Look, all she wants is some tea and toast! The bread is oddly shaped and hard as a rock!

Truly, it’s a very difficult time for her.

Louis’ eligible bachelor son takes Albert and crew on a nice walk through the woods. Albert, still strapped in on the tallest emotional rollercoaster in the world, unexpectedly strips down to dive into some water along the way. And his two comrades follow suit – or, uh, lack thereof – and continue to flirt.

Victoria stumbles upon this scene while on a walk through the grounds. Her French comrade says it must just be a group of peasants bathing. I mean, even peasants need to have a little fun every now and then. Victoria gets quite the giggle out of the whole situation, and fake yells at Albert when he returns from his pool party.

Feeling refreshed from his swim, Albert decides to tell Victoria about his father/not-father/uncle situation. Of course, Victoria is nothing but supportive.

After a cozy heart-to-heart, the pair decide to lift their spirits by talking business with Louis …

Best Laid Plans

Albert makes quite the case during their evening business talk, and Victoria is there to back him up. It seems like negotiations went pretty well! Louis Philippe agrees to refrain from a Spanish pairing! All is right in the world …

For a minute.

And after all of that, Louis Philippe lied to them! After all those pretty gardens, the little Bourbon birds and tea-less afternoons, Louis Philippe stabbed them in the back!






According to PBS, “The incident in Episode 3, known as the “Affair of the Spanish Marriages,” was indeed a tumultuous time in Anglo-French relations. Louis Philippe’s arrangement of a Spanish match threatened to overthrow the sensitive peace the two nations had built.”

Furthermore, “two years after the incident, King Louis Philippe was forced to abdicate.” (So there!)

Albert comes to tell Victoria the bad news. And of course, she’s mad. But she has Albert, and they’re so good to each other, so she gets over it. And she has one more nice surprise for Albert: She’s expecting again!

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