The Bears on Pine Ridge

[thunder rumbling] [thunder rumbling] [crickets chirping] [dogs barking] [Tyra] Where was I going in life?

What was I even doing?

I had, like, goals for myself and now I just... now I'm just stuck.

I thought that... you know, I'm gonna be all these great things in high school and then I'm gonna, like, graduate.

I'm gonna get a, like, a good job or even go to college and then get a really good job.

Just got ruined though.

I couldn't think the same way since she died.

Trying to be something better.

Someone better than a person who grew up on the rez.

Turning out to be exactly that, though.

[ deep rumbling thunder ] Right here.

I want to cut across my arm.

Just, just to have that much control.

Over what I can do with myself.

I just want to cut.

What would it matter if you just went home and killed yourself?

Would anybody even care?

[strong winds] [radio broadcast] Things have gotten to a critical point.

The tribe even declared a State-of-Emergency.

[Tiny] Where they at?

[Eileen] Right behind you.

[Radio] There were at least 103 suicide attempts... [Tiny] Yep, they're coming.

[Radio] ...within three months.

<i>[Verlyn]</i> <i>Oh, it's hard because...</i> I realize that when you talk to these children, you take on their feelings.

You know, maybe Tiny and them- Eileen told you that but...

I never believed in that.

And I'm like going home, and I'm distraught, and... feeling this way, feeling that way, and I'm taking it around to people that are my loved ones.

<i>And then five months ago,</i> <i>someone calls into dispatch...</i> <i>about this kid, in Kyle,</i> <i>and Tiny went over there,</i> <i>to support the family.</i> <i>That's what we're there for.</i> <i>If they need us, we're there.</i> And she's like, come over there with me.

It's a gunshot wound to the head.

[gunshot echos] <i>Took me back to 1989.</i> [newscater speaking in reverse] <i>Affected me right there.</i> <i>It took me back to that place.</i> <i>Like I was in a time machine.</i> - And now there has been a wave of Indian suicides.

It is an epidemic.

<i>[Verlyn]</i> <i>When I go back to that time,</i> <i>I can remember just sitting</i> <i>on the couch, scared.</i> [TV Broadcaster] Indian parents and students are worried... worried about who might be next.

Memorial services for the suicide victims have become a regular occurrence.

<i>[Verlyn]</i> <i>I've seen the fear and the hurt.</i> <i>You know, it traumatized</i> <i>our life so bad.</i> <i>My experience with my brother...</i> <i>I was the last one to talk to him.</i> <i>And I don't want no other</i> <i>kid to go through that.</i> <i>It was still tough for me.</i> I just started playing everything over in my mind.

I could smell the blood.

I could hear my mom screaming.

And I could hear myself grabbing my shoes, running down the hallway.

Hear my brother losing his mind.

You know, it just, that's, it just took me back to that place, and I said, I can't.

I can't do it, Tiny.

[Tiny] Now remember why we're here and why we're walking.

Listen up now.

When we walk, we pray.

You're praying for him to have that journey... that he gets to the place where he needs to be.

And you guys are friends, you're classmates, you're brothers, and we walk with one in mind.

[SInging Lakota Prayer Song] <i>[Laticia] You can't watch people die</i> <i>day after day, you know?</i> It builds up to a point where you gotta deal with it.

<i>I remember going on</i> <i>a ride with her...</i> <i>and she said, I have a</i> <i>feeling, I have a feeling.</i> And she ran out of the car and she didn't come back.

[dog barking] [Tiny] Shh, get.

<i>[Laticia]</i> <i>She ran into this little shack house.</i> <i>And it just seemed like it was a long</i> <i>lapse of time, but it probably wasn't.</i> <i>And by the time I went</i> <i>and peeked in there...</i> she was standing there holding this kid that was lifeless.

<i>Holding him up.</i> <i>And just praying.</i> [Tiny] Pray for yourself that you have strength to get through these next days.

Pray for Tunkasila to give you the strength, to overcome any struggles.

<i>[Laticia] But I just kind of froze, like,</i> <i>what am I supposed to do?</i> <i>And then all of a sudden the cops</i> <i>come running in, cutting the kid down.</i> <i>And I was looking at her</i> <i>like, how do you handle this?</i> <i>What is your strength?</i> <i>I've been trained in this because</i> <i>I've been in a health care field,</i> but how do you handle that?

[sobbing] [Tiny] It's, it's really a hard time.

This is a hard time for us.

Because we don't have any answers.

And we can ask each other why.

But we'll never know why.

But you guys have to be there for each other.

If you know one of your friends is having a hard time over this, stay with them.

Do not leave them alone.

I'll say it again.

Do not leave them alone.

Because we are all we've got.

We have to help each other if we want this to stop.

[distant traditional drumming] <i>[Tiny] We started the Sweetgrass</i> <i>Project right here in our community.</i> <i>We're teachers and coaches</i> <i>and parents and grandparents.</i> <i>We aren't doctors.</i> <i>We're just regular people.</i> <i>There just didn't seem to be enough</i> <i>counselors around, or enough resources,</i> <i>or enough ears just to listen to</i> <i>what they were trying to say, so</i> <i>we carry that on our shoulders.</i> [Tiny] Jackie, did you find her?

Is she okay?

Is she safe?

Okay, good.

My protocol is that I need to talk to her.

It's part of my job, I have to make sure.

No, you did the right thing.

Because a lot of times we wait until it's too late.

Okay, you bet.

These are some of the kids that, um, committed suicide.

And, I came in one day and one of my coworkers had them all down.

And she said, cause that's sad.

How can you come into work and look at that wall?

How can I not?

I remember.

And it's just, you know, it gives me, I don't know, a different, a different kind of strength.

I can't really explain it, but... it gives me a different kind of strength when I... Because I can tell you about every one of them.

I can tell you about every one of them.

If I had all my cards, this wall would be covered for the last four years.

It would be covered.

That wall would be covered.

I don't know how you would take that, but it inspires me to work harder and to be more visible.

To be more visible.

Do I have my book?

Oh, you have my book.

- Right here.

This is the most current one.

Yeah.

These are just referrals, individual referrals that Tiny does... just to keep track of the individuals to see if they're getting follow up in... in their care.

- I was looking for all my other ones- here we go.

- Yeah, that's year one.

- This is year ... - Oh, that's year two.

- Okay, but I just wanted to give them a visual.

- That's a quarter, yeah.

So yeah, I get to do this.

This will be the end of year three's data, right here.

- This, this is just all my work.

These are all mine.

Just mine alone.

- Yeah.

[traditional drumming] <i>[Tiny] We have to work to</i> <i>bring the spirit back in our children.</i> <i>Because so much has been taken</i> <i>from us over many generations.</i> <i>But I know someday...</i> <i>we'll get it all back.</i> [Uptempo Lakota Music] <i>I'm really a positive person.</i> <i>And I think that all of our</i> <i>children out there...</i> <i>are going to have a</i> <i>better tomorrow...</i> <i>but they have to have</i> <i>somebody to stand there</i> <i>and give them that</i> <i>little bit of push.</i> [Motivational music begins] [Tiny] Okay, let's go eight to a group.

Make eight to a group.

<i>[Tiny]</i> <i>We focus on every issue.</i> <i>We focus on prevention,</i> <i>building trust, and communication</i> <i>between all our kids.</i> - You have to trust each other!

You have to trust each other!

<i>- And strengthening the community as well.</i> - We're going to play a couple of games here, but I need your participation.

You were given limited resources to put your creation together.

But when we work as a team, when we communicate with each other we can get things done.

[applause] <i>- I always say you have to have a</i> <i>love for mankind to help people.</i> <i>That's just it, you don't have</i> <i>to have a doctorate degree.</i> <i>You have to have compassion for people.</i> [heavy laughter] - Oh my goodness.

Look at that thong.

[heavy laughter] <i>- And you gotta be willing to</i> <i>come out of your comfort zone.</i> - Look at that.

Oh, man.

- E, S, What's that spell?

- Thorpes.

- What?

What?

- Thorpes.

Thorpes.

I can't hear you.

- Thorpes.

What's that mean?

<i>- You have to go out into your community</i> <i>and pray to the creator, to Tunkasila,</i> <i>is to put the people in my path</i> <i>that's going to need me every day.</i> [Tiny] How many of you understand who you are?

That's kind of a stupid question, huh?

But how many of you understand what upsets you?

Okay?

There are no wrong or right answers.

There's nothing wrong here.

Alright?

So don't worry about what you put down.

Don't worry about being cool, cause y'all are cool, but you're not as cool as me yet.

[laughter] <i>[Tiny] After we went under our</i> <i>second State-of-Emergency in</i> <i>February, March, of 2015...</i> <i>we've been putting a bigger</i> <i>responsibility on our teenagers.</i> - Now the last three questions are really serious now.

Have you ever seriously thought about killing yourself?

Yes or no?

<i>- We aren't getting the assistance that</i> <i>we hoped we were going to get,</i> <i>when we made the declaration.</i> <i>We're not seeing any</i> <i>additional counselors...</i> <i>or any solutions for mental</i> <i>health resources.</i> <i>So we're asking the youth to step up.</i> - Where's your paper?

Open it up.

Follow along.

Because what?

Because this is important.

I'm going to share with you.

Yesterday, we had five attempts... on the Pine Ridge Reservation.

- I know one.

- You know one.

So it's not, it's not something funny, is it?

It's not something funny.

You guys over there, you better knock it off.

- And with that responsibility, sometimes comes a lot of butt chewing from me.

- But he don't even listen for [explitive].

Now behave, you guys.

When it comes to suicide, I get really serious about it.

Because I'm tired of burying our young people.

<i>- But I tell them I'm not getting after</i> <i>you because I just want to get after you.</i> <i>We have to get through this together</i> <i>because nobody is coming to help us.</i> - We need to make sure that you know the signs of suicide.

So it's really important.

And I love laughter.

I do.

Laughter is the best medicine.

<i>- You know, it's, it's tough.</i> <i>I wish we didn't have to ask them to help.</i> <i>But you know, we don't</i> <i>have that privilege.</i> <i>We don't have other options.</i> <i>We need to get the youth involved.</i> - You always say, snitches get stitches.

But, one time you want to be a snitch, you'll be the best snitch is if you save a life.

Cause you don't want to carry that with you.

And you don't want to say, my best friend, my best friend Jared was having a hard time... ...and he was calling me... ...but I laughed him off cause I wanted to go ride horse.

[Tiny cont'd] And now he's not here anymore.

You gotta live with that guilt.

You don't wanna ever have to do that.

[News Broadcast] Uh, we're live.

Live on Pine Ridge right now.

We're going to listen to Teresa Two Bulls, who is president of the Oglala Sioux Tribe.

She will be discussing here, uh, the State of Emergency on the reservation, where suicide is now the leading cause of death among teens.

Uh, no one can say why, and just that they have not been funded to, to deal with this very serious situation.

<i>[Tiny] When we declared the first</i> <i>State of Emergency,</i> <i>it was a big decision </i>for our tribe... <i>to try to bring attention to</i> <i>the crisis, nationally.</i> - Today is a very important day.

As the Tribal President, I call this press conference on a very important issue, which is suicide.

Especially teen suicide.

<i>- We had to go public with the crisis</i> <i>because we needed mental</i> <i>health resources.</i> <i>They're not reaching</i> <i>us on, on the rez.</i> <i>And so, we wanted some</i> <i>government accountability.</i> - I call the hearing to order.

This is a hearing of the Indian Affairs Committee of the United States Senate.

And the subject of the hearing today is an oversight hearing on youth suicide in Indian country.

- During the 2008 and 2009 fiscal years, at any given time, we have had an average number of up to 60 tribal member, community members waiting to access our behavioral health services.

They could wait up to an average of three months before they could even see a counselor or a clinician.

- You know, it's hard.

More than 80 percent of them will never receive treatment.

- We have a mental health clinic with only one psychologist.

It is my understanding that she is currently on administrative leave indefinitely.

- We cannot be silent, and so I will add... my own... family loss.

There was, there's a lot more pictures.

You see a lot of her pictures with her friends, family, times in her life.

Just as she grew up.

I know that's pretty sad.

I tell all these kids, you don't want your mom to go through what I did.

I'd rather have my daughter, then these pictures.

That's all I have is pictures and memories.

<i>She had a really close friend</i> <i>and he passed away.</i> <i>It was just a little bit too much for her.</i> <i>So we called IHS.</i> <i>You know, my daughter is depressed</i> <i>and we want some counseling.</i> <i>And she said, um, I'll have to</i> <i>call you when my schedule opens up.</i> <i>We don't have no open dates right now.</i> <i>And I was like, wow, okay.</i> <i>The sad thing was, two weeks after</i> <i>she passed away, IHS called me and</i> <i>asked me if I was ready to set up</i> <i>an appointment, and I was like</i> <i>my daughter killed herself two weeks ago.</i> Where were you two weeks ago?

Where were you a month ago?

Where were you a month and a half ago?

- Patients cannot withstand these wait times, and nobody should have to.

Recently, a clinical psychologist brought in to help with suicide prevention, worked for one day before quitting.

<i>[Tiny] No matter how many years</i> <i>that we've been facing Congress</i> <i>to try to bring in more resources, </i> <i>we never got the help we</i> <i>needed for behavior health.</i> - We have asked the IHS to deploy behavior health professionals.

We have asked them to provide individual assessments and to work with our schools.

I hope this hearing today results in action from Congress to assist in saving the lives of our youth.

<i>- By 2015, we declared our</i> <i>second State of Emergency</i> <i>when our suicide rates were</i> <i>the highest in the country.</i> - There were 50 attempts.

50 individuals going to psych units for the month of January.

That's like one and a half people per day, going to a psych unit every day.

We had no psychiatrists, no , no one to prescribe psychotropic meds.

And that one provider.

[Producer] You guys only have one provider?

- Yeah.

- So what is the max amount of people that you can see per day in that behavioral health center?

- Okay, so, for the month... ...four people.

Four slots, half a day, one day a month.

So we only saw four people.

You only see four people a month.

[Producer] In the behavioral health department, in one month... you're only allowed four patients?

So only four patients could come per month to try and get medication, is that right?

- Right.

We need all the resources we can get.

We got a suicide problem here.

[Tiny] We're going to check on a young man.

We're missing a young man for a few days now.

Nobody's seen him.

[Eileen] We got a text that this kid was suicidal or talking suicidal and... ...hoping somebody calls in that they've seen him, but nobody does.

Nobody calls in.

- I think the last place we saw him was on this highway right here.

- And it was cold, and he only had a Levi jacket on.

He's gonna seek shelter or a friend.

And then there's not enough cops, you have 28 for the whole rez, and on each shift there's only like one, two, three, for middle, east and west.

With a little bit of cops, what the hell do we do?

- And here lately we have some that are just dropping off the face of the earth.

We can't find them.

- We get at least sometimes just one or sometimes several a day, where someone's contemplating suicide.

It's a everyday thing.

We had one girl, she committed suicide... believe these girls all had a suicide pact because it just... after she did it, then there were several others that followed.

Whenever you see a child dead, you know, it's pretty gruesome in itself.

But when you see them die a pretty tragic death, you know, that can take a toll on you sometimes.

We can only do so much.

What'd they say?

A little over 3 million square miles and half the time we're covering it solo, so... well pretty much all the time.

<i>[Nichelle]</i> <i>I've lived here my entire life.</i> <i>It used to be a long time ago, if there</i> <i>was a wake or a funeral going on</i> <i>you knew about it,</i> <i>you heard about it,</i> <i>because they didn't happen often.</i> <i>But now it happens so much that</i> <i>you can't keep track of it.</i> <i>We cover a big area here.</i> <i>You can't drive fast enough.</i> <i>You get there and you can work and do</i> <i>everything you can, but the time, the</i> <i>but the time, the distance, you</i> <i>can't do anything about it.</i> [phone ringing] [Eileen] What's going on?

[Phone] Nope, nothing.

[Tiny] Okay, because we just feel that... maybe we should start here in town, if that's the last place we saw him.

We could get more people to join us here in the search right on the side of the creek and go down through their creek and come through sundance grounds and out towards, um [Phone] (skeptical tone) Mmm...

It's been too long now, and now we just, we just want him home.

[Eileen] I understand.

[Phone] Alright, I'll, I'll give you a call back if anything.

- Alright.

- Alright.

- Okay, now, Eileen?

You doing alright, sister?

We're just gonna check that one trailer, right, Eileen?

- Yeah.

- Alright.

<i>[Tiny]</i> <i>You know, it's, it's tough.</i> <i>Because, a lot of times, we,</i> <i>we can't get there in time.</i> <i>And we find them when it's too late.</i> <i>Nobody wants to go into a house and</i> <i>find somebody that you couldn't get to.</i> <i>Knowing that maybe we lost a child because</i> <i>they felt there was no one to talk to.</i> [Phone] Hi, this is the Suicide Prevention Center Crisis Line.

Could I have your name, please?

- Tyra.

- Tyra, alright.

I just have a few quick questions to understand your situation a bit better, if that's okay.

What best describes your race or ethnicity?

- Native American.

Have you ever, like, been on a reservation?

- Um, very, very briefly, like for a very short period of time.

I wouldn't say that I really know how that works, no.

- I guess just living on a reservation in general is hard and it adds to a lot of my depression.

- That's, I guess, that's another reason.

- I'm sure it does.

Yeah, I can only imagine.

[Phone] I have no idea what it must be like but I can only imagine that... just that, I mean the thing itself or the concept itself of, you know just... keeping people in certain place.

As much as it must be... you know, important to preserve the culture but I'm sure... there is a sort of sense of isolation that comes with that, right?

Have you ever thought about how you would do it?

Like a plan for how you would kill yourself?

- Yep.

There's a lot of, like, bigger scars that aren't going away.

And all of the ones that you're able to see now... are actually within the last week.

And I'm starting to cut more, and if it's not a lot of cuts, then it's really deep cuts.

I, I think I ended up in some random hospital like three times because of it.

- Wow.

<i>[Tyra] I started cutting</i> <i>after my best friend killed herself,</i> <i>right before my freshman year.</i> <i>And then it led to my first attempt.</i> <i>It started escalating into my sophomore</i> <i>and then now my junior year where...</i> <i>...it's getting worse and worse.</i> <i>I constantly, I'm constantly</i> <i>thinking about taking my life.</i> <i>I'm constantly in like</i> <i>this really dark place.</i> [Phone] Um, thanks a lot for sharing that, Tyra.

- it just feels like the counselors would rather send you out and...

I don't want to go back to some random place where they think I just need a babysitter for a few nights.

So, like, anytime I am feeling really down, then I don't have that person there with me.

I don't have anybody to talk to, so I just choose cutting instead.

I don't like who I am.

There's nothing good about me anymore.

I'm sick of wasting my time.

I'm tired of living.

I'm wore out.

<i>[Tyra narrating]</i> <i>I just remember feeling alone.</i> <i>Feeling like nobody cares.</i> <i>And thinking, it's my time to die.</i> <i>And I, like, started</i> <i>cutting down my wrist.</i> <i>And as soon as I was going to</i> <i>start to cut down the other...</i> <i>[Knocking at door]</i> <i>I heard Tiny and Eileen at the door.</i> <i>[Knocking at door]</i> <i>[Tiny]</i> <i>Tyra!</i> <i>- They weren't supposed to get</i> <i>here, like, so early and so fast.</i> <i>[Knocking at door]</i> <i>And she's like, Tyra,</i> <i>just please open up.</i> <i>And I can hear them crying, it was</i> <i>like just open up the door, please.</i> <i>And I was like, screaming</i> <i>at them, go away.</i> <i>I'm not going to open up the door.</i> <i>It angered me because I was</i> <i>ready to go be with my friend.</i> <i>And they weren't supposed to be there.</i> <i>They were supposed to get</i> <i>here later, after I was gone.</i> <i>I needed someone to know, but I didn't,</i> <i>I didn't want my family to find me.</i> <i>Wanted someone who...</i> <i>I knew would do something right away,</i> <i>rather than freak out and...</i> <i>...you know, not know what to do.</i> [tense music] I'm uncomfortable.

Look at it.

Do you think someone that small should ever have to be here?

I see.

Or someone that small?

Or like all three of them?

I kind of want to talk to her alone, just... because all those nights she came over when I wasn't feeling good.

We would just talk.

[Tyra singing in Lakota] [singing] "You're so beautiful" "eyes of an angel" [singing indistinct] The poem they put on her obituary said, I didn't mean to make you wonder.

I didn't mean to make you cry.

I didn't mean to leave you forever asking why.

That makes a lot of sense, doesn't it?

Just because, a lot of the people who do this... Gee, that's all you're left with is basically just asking why and... mostly just, why would you do this?

This one was one of her best friends.

It's not sticking.

She also died from suicide.

<i>They say if someone does take their</i> <i>own life, then their spirit wanders</i> <i>alone and in darkness, until the</i> <i>time that they're supposed to die.</i> <i>I never stop worrying about</i> <i>her in that dark place.</i> <i>I always thought, like, I'm most</i> <i>likely just gonna take my own life.</i> <i>And when I do, I know I'll see her.</i> <i>And I wouldn't have to be</i> <i>scared or afraid or anything.</i> <i>So when that day does come, I</i> <i>know I'd be happy to see her.</i> [Tiny] Let's talk about, uh, Wiyaka.

Let's talk about, how'd you feel?

How did you feel when Wiyaka did that?

And the cutting.

We had a little setback, right?

[Tyra] Mm hmm.

She left without saying anything.

I thought to myself, I need answers, cause she didn't tell anyone.

She just did it.

- Did you feel that you were going to be with her?

Did you feel you needed answers so you were going to take your life?

- Yeah.

- Okay.

- Because I didn't know how else to get answers, like.

So, I thought, why not just leave this place?

I can go see her, so...

I could get those answers, ask why she did it.

- How do you feel now, Tyra?

Right now?

[Tyra begins crying] And that's okay, baby girl.

- That I couldn't do anything to help her.

- You haven't grieved properly yet.

And you're carrying a lot of guilt, and it's bottled up.

You're isolating yourself with it, and it's not healthy.

We want you to open up, so people can be there for you.

And so many people love you, and they know the pain that you've gone through.

Suicide is, it's cruel and it's cold.

And it leaves their pain with us for the rest of our lives.

<i>[Tiny narrating]</i> <i>I remember my first suicide.</i> <i>I remember how devastated I was.</i> <i>It stays with me.</i> <i>For everyone that I lose, I go</i> <i>through this period of grieving.</i> <i>I go through the guilt.</i> <i>It's as if I've lost someone in my life.</i> - Yo, what up, Terrence?

What up, David?

Man, that game was crazy last night, right?

Hello?

What's your guys problem?

What up, John John , Tyrell?

Hello?

John John.

John John, you can't ignore me, man.

We're fam.

<i>- I could tell you about their childhood.</i> <i>And I could also tell</i> <i>you about their pain.</i> - Why are you crying?

You could talk to me, you know?

<i>- I could tell you their aspirations.</i> - What is this?

<i>- I could tell you what they wanted to be.</i> - No, no.

We have State coming up, I got colleges coming to watch me.

<i>- You see so much potential in those</i> <i>young men and women...</i> <i>and they're not here today?</i> - I wanna live.

I don't want to die.

I wanna live.

[Building piano music] [Tiny] Places.

Okay.

Let's go.

This is a skit about... somebody coming out of their comfort zone to help the young people in our community.

A lot of people, they want somebody to save lives, but they don't want to do it.

They expect somebody else to do it.

And these are the way that they're taking their own lives.

These are the way they're harming themselves.

[Radio DJ] Mitkuyepi, I have a very special interview this morning.

We're gonna have, uh, the machine behind the Bear Project.

- Good morning.

- [Tiny] Good morning.

- Well, I guess what I want you to talk about is, like, I'm curious about the Bear Project.

What does it do?

I know you do a lot, but I'm really curious.

of what it does.

- Okay, um...

They're survivors of life.

Not all the kids that come into the BEAR Program have tried to commit suicide.

The majority has.

And you see them crying, they're having a hard time, because they've been there, they've done that.

Look at their tears.

<i>We are keeping it real.</i> [Applause] <i>We tell the truth.</i> - The kids that you see perform here today, they act out their story.

Some of them hung themselves, not once, not twice.

Some of them tried at attempts more than ten times.

They're survivors.

<i>- You know, they don't cover it up,</i> <i>because they just see too much of that,</i> <i>and their voice needs to be heard.</i> <i>Their story needs to be told.</i> - So what we do is part of therapy.

They're here to share their story and ask that you listen.

[Applause] - In my life, totally, I've attempted suicide 12 times.

<i>It's a rude awakening,</i> <i>but it's important.</i> - I've been hospitalized more than 13 times.

When I first started trying to commit, it was really hard on me because I didn't know what to do, I didn't know where to go.

I didn't think anyone was going to be there for me or... if I was going to talk to someone, they were just going to shrug me off.

And then, I met Tiny Decory and the Bears, and...

I'm working on changing myself because... what I've been through is the worst.

My attempts range from cutting to where I actually held a gun to my head.

There shouldn't be a little boy or girl crying because they don't feel like they want to live anymore.

[Tiny] I mean, I don't want to say this is America, but it is.

And the people need to know the truth.

These are our children.

And we have to start looking at it as, as that.

We.

If we are going to combat the suicide, we all have to do it together.

We are all responsible.

Every one of us is responsible.

- I just want to say to everyone, you're never alone, no matter what.

Because everyone is loved and everyone has someone.

You guys are all amazing and beautiful.

Thank you.

[Applause] - Okay.

Now?

Okay.

- My name's Tyrell Pond.

I'm 14.

I live on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation.

- My name is Deanna Janis.

I'm 17 years old.

- My name's Dakota Big Crow.

And I'm 17.

- Hold on.

[building inspirational piano] [whisper] What am I supposed to say again?

- Sorry.

I really get nervous.

Okay.

- I'm Lanita Courtier I'm 16.

- Hello, my name is Brian Sherman Jr.

I'm 18 years old.

- Oh my God.

Okay.

[shy laughter] - My name is Tabrea Red Cloud.

I go to Pine Ridge School.

- My name is Cailee Ferguson.

I am 16 years old and I live on the Pine Ridge Reservation.

[lively playground chatter] [laughter] [Inspirational music builds] [Tiny] Ladies and gentlemen, your king and queen, homecoming royalty.

[applause] [traditional drumming] <i>[Cailee]</i> <i>This one time I had a dream.</i> <i>That everything bad just disappeared.</i> And that dream felt so real after I woke up.

[traditional drumming] <i>I could see everyone gets along,</i> <i>everyone enjoys each other's company.</i> <i>We had ceremonies and powwows and</i> <i>rodeos and cookouts are going.</i> <i>And I had my dad and my</i> <i>little sisters with me.</i> <i>We were just happy.</i> That's what usually goes through my mind, like how I wish he was here.

And how he's my main reason, I tell myself, just to keep going for him.

- Going home every day, I'd see like, the alcoholism in my family.

I'd see people trying to fight, and after a while it broke me down.

I thought about it, but I realized, um, it's a lot better to be more open with people than to be closed in.

I mean, if you bottle things up, it won't get better.

- It hurts me because...

I know what it's like to have a good home.

And knowing that my friends don't, it hurts me.

It wants me to, it makes me want to take them home with me.

- I transferred schools a lot because...

I was always bullied... and I always thought like, maybe I shouldn't be here and just, I'm worthless and everything, like, they want me to feel that way and they got it.

<i>- Our generation, they want</i> <i>to make it off the rez.</i> They want to become something.

- I always wanted to live in Los Angeles, California.

I always liked the big cities and the towers.

I like the traffic for some reason.

I don't know, I really like the traffic.

- Dancing, hip hop dancing, but like, one day I played a beat on YouTube and I realized, like, I could rap off the top of my head.

- Just tell me when to stop.

[Producer] Stop.

- Stop right here or keep going?

- Stop right there.

Stop right there?

Got it?

- I'm sort of undecided.

I'm kind of just gonna go into the National Guard, have them pay for my college here in South Dakota, and... find out what I want to do then.

- Um, um, I want to be, what's that called?

- A doctor or a journalist.

- Going out with my friends and getting pizza.

- I could become a journalist doctor.

<i>[Cailee]</i> <i>I want to be a photographer.</i> <i>I like taking pictures of things and...</i> I just like how it captures the moment.

And you can look back on it and just remember that moment like it was yesterday.

<i>[Brian rapping] "All alone in the</i> <i>world with a broken home"</i> "A little boy strives hard with a broken heart."

"Nobody in the world sees open scars."

"Everybody understands but they can't relate."

- Oh, I want to be a famous basketball player when I grow up.

[Producer] Oh, really?

You forgot what a basketball player was?

[laughs] - "Poverty on my land is just another sequel."

"What you want to hear is a voice for the people."

[Tiny] Welcome to Pine Ridge Village.

First annual Parade of Lights.

Santa Claus and his elves will be in the parade.

Christmas in the village.

Honk your horns.

Honk your horns.

Christmas in the village.

Honk your horns.

Yeah, yeah.

<i>[Radio Broadcast] The BEAR program</i> <i>is a grassroots group</i> <i>on the frontlines of the suicide epidemic.</i> <i>The volunteer group takes part</i> <i>in powerful stage performances</i> <i>that address suicide head on.</i> <i>South Dakota Public Broadcasting takes</i> <i>us to the Parade of Lights in Pine Ridge.</i> - "Santa Claus is coming..." <i>[Radio Broadcast]</i> <i>This is Tiny DeCorey.</i> <i>She's the founder of the suicide</i> <i>prevention group, the BEAR Program.</i> <i>The group is made up of mostly</i> <i>young suicide survivors, in an effort</i> <i>to stop suicide in Pine Ridge.</i> <i>She and the young people</i> <i>in the BEAR Program</i> <i>constantly monitor social media</i> <i>and jump into action</i> <i>whenever someone is in crisis.</i> <i>'The Bear Cave' is in the basement</i> <i>of the Billy Mills Hall.</i> <i>A group of young kids prepare</i> <i>gift baskets of food for families</i> <i>in need on the reservation.</i> <i>Tiny says some kids who don't have a</i> <i>place to go are able to sleep here.</i> - This is my Jade.

She's got a bump.

Turn sideways, let's see a bump.

[shy laughter] She's gonna have a baby.

[excited chatter] [Youth] That's the newest addition to the Bears.

- We're gonna have a new baby bear.

<i>[Radio Broadcast]</i> <i>This is Jaden.</i> <i>She's 16 years old.</i> <i>She turns her forearms over,</i> <i>revealing dozens of scars.</i> <i>[Jaden]</i> <i>It took me a long time to tell Tiny.</i> <i>To actually, like, pick up</i> <i>the phone and call Tiny.</i> <i>I thought that that's my way of, um,</i> <i>releasing the pain and stuff like that...</i> <i>getting my anger out was to hurt myself.</i> <i>[Tiny] What do we say, you know,</i> <i>Until you walked into my shoes?</i> <i>Back off with your judging what I'm doing.</i> <i>I've never cut my arms, so I</i> <i>can say I can only imagine.</i> <i>Well, I have kids in the BEAR Program...</i> <i>that can say, I know what you're feeling.</i> <i>I know because I've been there.</i> <i>So I know what you're going through.</i> <i>And that's the big difference,</i> <i>it's just a click on.</i> <i>[Tyrell] A lot of people's friends and</i> <i>families have lost people to suicide.</i> <i>Even at school, kids will come up and</i> <i>talk to us how they've been depressed,</i> <i>how they tried to kill themselves.</i> <i>And with all the Bears,</i> <i>we know how it feels.</i> <i>So we can talk to them from our hearts</i> <i>because we know exactly how it feels.</i> [singing] "Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, hey, hey" "hey, hey, hey, na, na, na, na..." <i>[Tiny] What we've been doing...</i> <i>is trying to have a place for the</i> <i>kids to speak their truth.</i> <i>It's a place where they can talk</i> <i>openly about their struggles.</i> <i>And to see the kids themselves helping</i> <i>each other, listening to each other,</i> <i>actually caring about each other.</i> <i>It gets me excited about what we're doing.</i> [clapping] [Tiny] Clap for me.

Get off your phone.

- I'm sorry.

[laughter] [Eileen] So what did you use?

[Tyra] A razor.

- Well, maybe we should get rid of those in your room from now and really think about it.

Sit down and really think, do I have to be this mad?

Do I have to hurt myself to stop this anger, or can I do it another way?

I know you're carrying a lot of guilt.

We all are.

But, we don't have to be alone in it.

So does it make it right to hurt yourself?

- No.

Did it take everything away?

- Nope.

- So, you're not doing yourself any good when you self harm, right?

We want to see more of you.

We want you to come down here and help with the Bears.

But you'd need to stop cutting.

You think you could do that?

<i>[Eileen]</i> <i>We are not counselors.</i> <i>You know, we're doing this because</i> <i>there aren't enough of them.</i> <i>And because they're not</i> <i>proactive in the community.</i> <i>It's a job at a hospital for them.</i> <i>But you know, we can have a</i> <i>kid open up where they can't.</i> <i>And you know, we know their home life,</i> <i>because we lived here too, you know.</i> [excited hollering] <i>It makes me proud to</i> <i>know we're still here.</i> <i>After facing some of the toughest</i> <i>things there is to go through.</i> <i>But you know, our future depends</i> <i>on the health of our people.</i> <i>The health of the next generation</i> <i>is crucial to our way of life.</i> <i>So it's sort of an even deeper</i> <i>crisis we're facing.</i> [Roger] I know a lot of students who struggle with issues at home.

And maybe I didn't know her whole story, but I just knew her in class and how respectful and kind hearted she was to other students.

She was self motivating when it came to the Lakota culture, the language.

Yeah, she's like one of the students that you least expect to commit suicide.

You know, you have to show them that you care.

Because the ones that, you know, that's what I see and when I talk to students, you know, that's sometimes they say that they'll break down.

Nobody cares.

Why should I care?

You know, so... yeah, it's tough, you know... [chokes up] when you, they leave on Friday and you say, hope you come back on Monday.

Excuse me.

It's tough, you know, cause you don't know if they're going to come back.

[chokes up] You don't know, and so you have to ask them.

Tell them, be good to one another.

Come back on Monday.

I wanna see you.

[sentimental music] [conducting roll call] [Speaking Lakota] Now, long time ago in our culture, you never called... your relative, by their name.

You called them by their Lakota relationship to you.

<i>It's like we failed them, especially</i> <i>here in the schools because,</i> <i>our job is to teach them, you</i> <i>know, about the past, but...</i> <i>to use that knowledge</i> <i>to help them in the future.</i> If you want to understand how things are on the reservation today... you have to look at these events that happened to our people.

<i>You know, you wonder why</i> <i>things are the way they are.</i> <i>I guess I could go back to</i> <i>America's boarding school,</i> <i>and the boarding school process.</i> <i>So you have this whole generation of young</i> <i>kids who are away from their parents</i> <i>and they're away from</i> <i>their homeland, the reservation,</i> <i>their culture, their language.</i> <i>They had to kill what was Indian in them.</i> Children, you know, growing up in a traditional Lakota society before European contact were able to roam freely.

[uplifting music begins] [traditional drumming] [Tiny] The riders are here.

Our riders have been riding their horse for four days.

Let them hear you, ladies and gentlemen.

[excited holler] "Li - li - li - li - li..." [rodeo announcer hollers] [victorious cheer] [youth hollers echo] [sentimental piano] <i>[Roger] You know, they were taught</i> <i>in their environment.</i> <i>They were taught through stories, teaching</i> <i>them in a good way, not yelling at them,</i> <i>raising their voice, because to us,</i> <i>children are Wakaneja, they're sacred.</i> [child's voice singing] <i>You know, a lot of people say,</i> <i>well, that was in the past, you need</i> <i>to get it, forget about the past.</i> <i>But what they don't realize is,</i> <i>in our Lakota belief...</i> you know, what happened to our grandparents may not have physically happened to us but psychologically and spiritually, they shared it with us.

<i>And so that historical</i> <i>trauma is still within us.</i> This is the aftermath, some of the picking up the bodies.

<i>The Wounded Knee Massacre is something</i> <i>that our people will never forget.</i> [traditional drumming] [Ceremonial leader] Nobody really knows exactly how many are buried here.

<i>[Roger] I'm at the age where...</i> I actually heard a grandmother who was there talk about it.

<i>You know, hearing her talk about when</i> <i>she was a little kid and experienced</i> <i>the Wounded Knee Massacre, you</i> <i>know, it was so tragic for her.</i> And when she'd talk about it, she'd just cry.

- This here is 6 feet across, 6 feet down, 60 feet long.

And some of these people that were found scattered all around, they were frozen.

They had to crush them, crush them down in order to fill the whole pit here with bodies.

Just imagine.

They're all buried here.

<i>[Roger] How do you get over, you</i> <i>know, such a horrific event?</i> [gun fire] [girls screaming] <i>The families, mothers, you know,</i> <i>children, grandmas, grandpas,</i> thought of as not even being human beings so they could just be wiped out.

<i>You know, and that's inside of us, that</i> <i>this country thinks of us like that.</i> <i>And that goes through a young person's</i> <i>mind, and that's, you know, put in</i> there where you're lower, your people were thought of as less than human, you know, and then a lot of them take that to heart, and then they just want get away from this world.

[group crying] [Young woman] I feel like... it's my fault because I was the last one to talk to Jemiah.

And he told me, I'm not going to do anything, Arie.

And when I got to work, my husband called me, he said Daniel found Jemaya hanging.

[group sobbing] I said, no, no, not Jemiah, not my Jemiah.

[Eileen] It's okay to cry.

It's okay to miss him, because that's what you're going to do, is miss him.

And you guys know, all our prayers help him to cross that river.

I know, because my nephew did it.

<i>[Eileen]</i> <i>He was 20 when he done it.</i> And I was just in shock.

I was, uh...

It was, that was just something I couldn't get over.

And there was nobody at that time to come talk to our family to tell us what it's like to go through that to, um, help us to grieve.

I would just sit outside my house and cry, because it was so hard.

And, uh, from that day on I told myself, I will always be there for them.

[crying] [Young woman] I came home.

I tried my best because I wanted to save him.

I wanted to try, I wanted to try.

I was so angry at myself, I still am.

I have to live with this for the rest of my life.

- If you haven't had it happen to you, you don't know that feeling.

<i>[Tyra]</i> <i>I wish it was me instead of you.</i> <i>[Eileen]</i> <i>It's a lost feeling, you know?</i> <i>[Tyra] I wish I could just give my</i> <i>life so you can have yours back.</i> <i>[Eileen] You're angry, you're sad,</i> <i>you're hurt, you're guilty.</i> <i>[Tyra crying] I failed you so much.</i> <i>[Eileen] You're wondering what could I</i> <i>have done to change this, you know?</i> <i>[Tyra crying]</i> <i>I'm so sorry.</i> <i>I'm so sorry I couldn't help you.</i> <i>I should have done my best.</i> [Eileen] What could I have done?

How could I have changed anything?

But... you gotta let that go because you'll never know why, exactly.

[firecrackers exploding] [sobbing] I can't do it anymore.

I can't get over it.

And the worst part is I can't even do anything about it.

And no one can help and I just have to go through it.

[Tiny] If you want to help yourself, you have to forgive yourself.

Because you can't carry that on and fulfill what you want to do in life.

She had problems that we couldn't help her with at the moment.

And that's what happens when they, you know, it just, it happens.

Sometimes you've got to look in the mirror and say, I forgive you, I forgive you.

I felt the same way with my granddaughter.

I thought I was ready, but I'm still not.

I really went through a lot, but I covered a lot of it up.

I covered a lot, and I did a lot of praying.

And I couldn't go out to her grave for the longest time.

I couldn't go out there because I'd say she's not there.

And I actually had myself believing she was going to walk through that door.

[giggles] But this wasn't the case.

I kept her hood sweater, her pink hood sweater on my bedpost so I could smell her every night and smell her every morning.

And I had to let all that go.

Eventually.

Eventually.

Because I know she would want me to live.

And, you know, Wiyaka would want you to live.

So, you're here.

Give me your hand.

You're here.

Look at Grams.

You're here to live your life... to Tyra's perfection.

You're here to take the world by the horns for you and for all the other kids that can't be here.

But you are here, and you're gonna do that.

<i>[Announcer] The BEAR Program will</i> <i>be our halftime entertainment.</i> <i>[Tiny] You gotta hurry, we got</i> <i>two minutes, you guys.</i> Let's go.

Bear, get out of here.

[Announcer] It started out a program to emphasize reading.

[Tiny] Hurry up, you got a minute.

You got one minute.

[Announcer] But now they're gonna emphasize life skills.

[Tiny] If you're dressed, go out there.

Here's some black.

Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up.

[Halftime buzzer] Get out there.

Get right there.

And don't bunch up together.

That's the first thing I critique.

Oh Shaka, they didn't put yours on good.

Okay, get out there, baby.

Get up there.

Get out there.

Listen to your music.

[Announcer] Hey, there they are.

Let's welcome the Bear Program!

[Applause] [Announcer] Give it up.

Give it up, people!

[Tiny] Spread out.

Some go down here.

Hey, listen to the music!

Excuse me, excuse me.

[Children's music begins] "Did you ever go fishing on a warm summer day?"

"when all the fish were swimming in the bay" "with their hands in their pockets and their pockets in their pants" "Did you ever see a fishy do the hoochie coochie dance?"

"Turkey in the straw.

Ha ha ha."

"Turkey in the straw.

He he he."

[backstage chatter] [Uptempo beat] [laughing hysterically] [Tiny] The majority of these kids are suicide survivors.

- Are what?

- Suicide survivors.

- Wow.

[Tiny] Okay, I got a little girl out there dancing.

- We can ease out of it.

- Ease out of that for me.

And thank the Bears.

[Announcer] Alright everybody, give it up for the BEAR Program.

[Tiny] Good.

[applause] [sentimental music begins] Come on.

Come on.

You guys did okay.

You bunched up on the, that side of the, the gym.

- Yeah, I was trying to move around.

- Uh huh.

But nobody, nobody came on this side.

So we bunched in.

But no, but yeah, so next time, when we go out, we'll, we'll come in from different sides.

<i>[Tiny] When we were growing up,</i> <i>we didn't have a lot.</i> <i>We weren't rich.</i> <i>But nobody else around</i> <i>us was rich either.</i> <i>So, we didn't know we were poor.</i> Come on in, come on in, come on in!

<i>We all had our struggles,</i> <i>but we all were a community.</i> There's Christmas trees.

Look at that, bears on a cloud.

A pizza, all down there, all the way, just whatever you want to do.

There's some nice stuff to make your mom a Christmas present.

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

<i>People would come and help you</i> <i>out, you would help them out.</i> How you doing?

<i>It was our way of life.</i> [Elder] How are you?

- Wast, how 'bout you?

- Happy holidays.

- You too.

Good to see you.

- Take care now.

- Oh, I have no choice but to take care.

- I know it.

I know it.

<i>I want the youth to have that feeling</i> <i>of a community and giving back.</i> [heartwarming music] <i>[Tyrell] What I do in my costume is what I</i> <i>can't do, without my costume.</i> <i>Like, I run around, I jump up and down, I</i> <i>run through the aisles giving high fives.</i> <i>And as the bear of the Bears, I</i> <i>feel like I really gotta do my part</i> <i>to bring life to my costume.</i> But right here is my first costume I ever, I ever performed in.

Aardy.

Good ol Aardvark.

[chuckles] And... the only way I could see out of him when I was I couldn't see right here, I couldn't see out of his eyes.

I had to see out of these two holes right here.

So, just putting on this head.

I could finally see out of these two holes.

But I, in one eye, I have to look this way.

In the other eye, I look out this way.

A lot of our costumes are They got some battle scars on them.

This is the padding for the inside of the skunk.

This, just holding this up, this is heavy.

So, wearing this while dancing for a good hour as hard as you can... um, you definitely get exercise from it.

[kids music] [heavy breathing] [Tyrell in costume] Ohh, here we go.

<i>Being a Bear you can expect to do a lot</i> <i>of different things for the community...</i> <i>but it's always the best when you're</i> <i>in costume, even though sometimes</i> <i>you'll feel like you're</i> <i>gonna pass out.

[laughs]</i> [applause] [heavy breathing] Whoo!

Bro, I'm dying.

[joyful laughter] <i>When you see a little kid reaching</i> <i>out for a hug or a high five...</i> <i>Or when they come up</i> <i>and just smile real big,</i> <i>that's always the best</i> <i>feeling in the world.</i> <i>For me personally, it's really</i> <i>helped me have a mentality change.</i> [heavy breathing] [hip hop music playing] <i>If I didn't have Bear in my</i> <i>life, I know I would have been</i> <i>a totally different person.</i> [sweet piano begins] [Tiny] Can you share with us some of the incidences at school or just... - I was bullied a lot.

I moved from three different schools just thinking it would get better but... All of 'em just got worse.

I just get... bullied mostly every day.

I couldn't wait to get out of school so I could just go back.

Every time I moved to a different school, I'd always think it'd be better.

<i>Came into the program because I</i> <i>was being bullied at school and I</i> <i>never really stuck up for myself.</i> <i>Being in Bear helped me talk more and</i> <i>help me get my self confidence up.</i> <i>It made me realize that I'm not</i> <i>alone in the world with my problems.</i> [uplifting music begins] <i>Once you join in, you're family.</i> <i>You're gonna feel loved</i> <i>from day one to the end.</i> - And... [laughter] <i>- So, if I didn't have Bear...</i> <i>I would probably, like,</i> <i>just be a shut in.</i> <i>But when I first joined, like, I felt</i> <i>like everyone was watching me...</i> <i>even though I was in costume.</i> <i>So I used to be super self conscious</i> <i>about every little thing I was doing.</i> <i>What if this person doesn't</i> <i>like me and starts bullying me?</i> <i>The same thoughts would come to crowds,</i> <i>like, what if this crowd don't like me?</i> <i>I still think like that every now and</i> <i>then, but, I remind myself that...</i> <i>I'm part of something bigger</i> <i>than, like, just me.</i> <i>And I want life for everyone.</i> <i>[Tiny] You guys have been a really</i> <i>good audience so far.</i> <i>Most of you know who we are,</i> <i>we are the Bear Program.</i> and we're here... We are here to have a good time, but I gotta see which class is the loudest, okay?

[shouting] First grade, where are you?

[kids hollering] Second grade, where are you?

[kids hollering] Third grade, where are you?

[kids hollering louder] When we talk about daily life for our youth... there is not a whole lot for the kids to do, here.

No, we don't have a movie theater, we don't have a bowling alley.

There's no libraries.

Here's our mall.

There's the mall.

There's just so much that the young people in the cities can do and have access to, and we don't.

We have to create our own recreation and give them a space where they can feel safe to just be themselves.

[Tyra laughing] Hanta (scram), little like... Hey!

aA (bad) bunny on the loose.

[playful laughter] [childlike laughter] <i>[Tyra] I've never actually thought I could,</i> <i>like, join the Bears because I thought like,</i> <i>I was too shy about it, I guess.</i> <i>I just, I was way too shy about</i> <i>it and, and I didn't really...</i> <i>want to be around a lot of people.</i> <i>But, like, I feel like talking</i> <i>to them, they seem to understand</i> <i>what I'm going through.</i> Oh, some of these look so pretty!

Look at that.

Oh, it has a little heart on it.

<i>So, after talking to more and more people</i> <i>and building up that trust, I started...</i> <i>becoming more outgoing, and like, now</i> <i>I want to be able to earn my costume.</i> <i>[group laughing]</i> <i>I want to learn, like, the skits.</i> <i>I want to learn the dances, all of this.</i> <i>But Tiny says, I still have a lot of self</i> <i>work to do before I can get to that point.</i> [Tiny] How's everybody doing?

They all have spaghetti?

[distant laughter] That's Peanut.

Peanut is blind.

Cataracts.

We have to clap our hands or stomp our feet.

Make noise and he'll follow the noise.

And he's not skinny.

He's far from that, you know.

So, the Patriarch here.

[computer mouse clicks] [pensive music builds] [Tiny on phone] It's complete bull [explitive] They have no valid reason to pull the plug on us.

- Oh my God.

- They'll make up any excuse to not pay our tribe for [explitive].

- Oh my God.

Wow.

<i>[News Broadcast]</i> <i>Tribal officials are concerned.</i> <i>After tribal leaders declared</i> <i>a State of Emergency</i> <i>one key effort, the Sweetgrass Program,</i> <i>is about to run out of funding.</i> [Reporter] The federal government will not be renewing a crucial grant, which would have funded the only suicide prevention program on the reservation for the next five years.

The decision came unexpectedly, as there is no backup plan for dealing with the reservation's suicide problem.

- We just buried one this morning, an 18 year old, a tribal member.

We buried him this morning.

We had another one a few weeks ago.

[Reporter] Tribal leaders are meeting with members of Congress, hoping they can find a solution to help resolve the issue.

- To listen to the students today from the school... uh, and their tragic stories and to know how much weight they are carrying around in their heart.

- That's a program that they've utilized to give hope to suicidal, um, students and youth.

and turn their lives around.

The fact that that's ending here in December means that we've got to get busy figuring out how to extend that program and to keep their funds flowing.

[radio] Funding, the biggest issue, and maybe Washington, D.C. is tired of hearing it, but it's the truth.

We do not have adequate funding.

We can continue and continue to state our case, but seems like nobody's listening to us.

<i>[Eileen]</i> <i>What do we do?</i> <i>You know, how are we</i> <i>going to keep this going?

Because</i> we're at a place now where we can bring the communities together and start helping them get our crisis teams going.

<i>The kids trust you, the</i> <i>people know to call you.</i> <i>We don't want to lose the</i> <i>trust of the children.</i> [radio] We're really facing some hard times with all of this.

We need to support Eileen Janis and Tiny Decory doing some really powerful work in Lakota country and we need to support them at those efforts as well.

<i>[Eileen] When we lost Sweetgrass,</i> <i>it just made it harder on us because...</i> <i>we don't have enough people to really</i> <i>get to these outer communities.</i> [traditional drumming] <i>And without Sweetgrass, who will do this?</i> <i>Who will go house to house</i> <i>right now if me and Tiny don't?</i> <i>The only ones would be, would</i> <i>be a cop or the ambulance.</i> <i>But they're so overwhelmed that we're</i> <i>gonna lose some of them too, you know?</i> [Dispatch] Hello, dispatch.

[Officer] What's going on?

- They're chasing a female she has a rope and she's threatening to 'Signal 20' and she's also high on huffing inhalant.

I guess one of the nephews is chasing her right now.

They keep calling in 911.

- Alright, okay.

- okay.

We're going to be going a little fast, so... [engine accelerates] [siren blaring] [Dispatch] I have a '32 call'.

Attempt 'Signal 20'.

Patient is cutting herself.

It's gonna be on northern housing.

[EMT] Ambulance base 'Medic 1'.

I think we're on scene, it doesn't appear to be anybody home.

We're going to go knock on the door.

- RP advised they don't have their electricity, their electricity is turned off.

- That's why it don't look like there's nobody home.

[knocking repeatedly] Ambulance!

<i>I think I had two or three in a row</i> <i>where they were actually completions.</i> <i>Where they, we got there</i> <i>and they were already dead.</i> It almost kinda sounds like there's somebody inside though.

[knocking] Hello?

Ambulance service.

<i>And the last one was, uh, a kid and</i> <i>we get on scene and he was hanging</i> <i>there, but he was still breathing.</i> <i>So we did CPR and we</i> <i>got him to Pine Ridge.</i> Ambulance!

<i>But, one thing that stuck</i> <i>with me was that...</i> <i>once we got to the ER,</i> <i>nobody showed up.</i> <i>So that kind of messes with you</i> <i>because, you know, that kid had nobody.</i> [siren] [breathing heavily] Uh... some kids came up to us and pointed the house out to us.

Base 'Medic One' has one male on board, we're returning to IHS.

[EMS radio sounds] <i>I mean, you can't just look at somebody</i> <i>and say, Oh, they can't do this job.</i> <i>I mean, it takes somebody who has</i> <i>to actually experience it and decide</i> <i>whether they want to do it or not.</i> [thunder rumbles] <i>[Nichelle] There was several,</i> <i>um, kids that, um...</i> <i>they hung themselves in a,</i> <i>in a low closet.</i> <i>Which means they had to be on</i> <i>their knees and they had to</i> <i>work really hard to complete it.</i> <i>Literally push themselves to the point</i> <i>where they, they strangled themselves.</i> <i>And it was, it was disturbing that someone</i> <i>would work that hard just to, just to die.</i> <i>It really, it changed my life because</i> <i>that's when I started staying home more.</i> <i>I was actually looking for other</i> <i>jobs because all I could think is,</i> <i>my kids aren't going to be like that.</i> [Dispatch] Uh, last update, they... were advising that the female took the rope and fled.

- 4-6-7, I have visual on the female, took off running up this draw.

Need 10-6 on the unit.

<i>[Nichelle] There's a possibility that</i> <i>they're not telling me something.</i> <i>There's something going on and</i> <i>then they let it build until</i> <i>they feel there's no other way.</i> <i>So, I think, I think it's</i> <i>more important that I be home.</i> [News] Ogallala Sioux Tribal President Julian Bear Runner declares a State-of-Emergency for Pine Ridge Reservation, saying they're seeing daunting suicide and suicide threats data.

<i>American Indian suicide rates were...</i> <i>2.7 times higher than other</i> <i>race rates in South Dakota.</i> <i>And in 2019, there were 184 suicides,</i> <i>which is the second highest number</i> <i>of suicides in South Dakota history.</i> [Tiny] I feel like I've been pushing, pushing something heavy right there.

And when I stand up, I just get dizzy.

[Tiny's daughter] Stress.

- I'm not, I'm not.

- You're moving, you're doing too much again.

You pure but ignore me, I know you ain't gonna respond to me but you always pure ignore me when I chew you out.

Too much, you're gonna slow down.

They told her she's overworked.

That she's overworked, that her muscles were completely inflamed.

And that she was just doing too much.

She had drove herself to the hospital because her heart rate was so crazy.

<i>A lot of the times when I know she gets</i> <i>to that point was because she'd come</i> stay with me for three or four days.

You know, she would have some really tough moments, especially if she was working with a kid, then all of a sudden, something happened, it was kind of like a personal hit, you know?

Like, what didn't I do, or why didn't they call me, or what could I have done?

<i>It took us a while to really</i> <i>realize that she didn't have time</i> <i>on her hands for anything else.</i> I feel like it's killing my mom.

It makes me get emotional.

Because my mom has, is so focused on taking care of everybody else that she ends up getting sick where she has chest pains.

<i>She doesn't get an eight</i> <i>hour sleep at night.</i> <i>She'll be lucky if she gets four.</i> And so, I'm not a big fan of the work she does.

She does amazing work and she does so much for people.

But from a daughter perspective, I I think it's killing my mom.

And I don't know how I'm supposed to embrace that.

[Tiny] I know I'm emotionally distraught.

You know, with all the deaths?

It's just seems like it's wake, after wake, after wake.

Gosh.

You know when I do my BEAR, I just love it.

I just get energy.

And I've been neglecting that part.

I cancelled performances because of people dying and I had to be at their wake to talk.

These kids are so hungry.

They're just hungry to, to be validated.

You know?

They're hungry for people to tell them, God, that was a good performance.

Or, you did, you really did good.

You know they just...

It's the best therapy for them.

The best therapy for those kids.

[sentimental piano begins] <i>[Tyra]</i> <i>I think it was like fifth grade.</i> <i>That morning we had an assembly</i> <i>and we went into the gym and</i> <i>Tiny came out and talked to us.</i> <i>[Tiny]</i> <i>Now I'm gonna check on my bears.</i> <i>Let me see if they're in the</i> <i>kitchen eating all the food.</i> <i>[Tyra]</i> <i>And you hear like so much about her...</i> <i>and you like to actually see</i> <i>her it's exciting.</i> <i>She's like a role model</i> <i>for a lot of people.</i> - Are they real?

They're, they're real to me.

Yeah, cause every time I open a book, kids, what's important?

Every time I open a book, or read a story, my mind can go anywhere it wants to go.

<i>- And then, they came out in the costumes.</i> <i>It's kinda like, oh my gosh,</i> <i>look at that, oh my god.</i> [excited chatter grows] [uplifting music begins] [children screaming in joy] <i>All the kids were like screaming,</i> <i>and I was like, I don't have to</i> <i>be shy about it because everybody</i> <i>else is feeling the same way, so.</i> <i>Okay, I'm gonna get excited about this.</i> - Boys and girls, the Bears!

[dreamy music] [thunderous foot stomps] [rhythmic clapping] <i>- Like, I was like...</i> <i>sitting there, I was looking</i> <i>at my friends, I was like...</i> <i>What is this?

Like...</i> <i>...you know?</i> [Uptempo music begins] [Tiny] Froggy, what do you wanna do?

Michael Jackson?

I don't know.

I don't know.

Look at Shunka.

Shunka!

Don't.

Shunka!

[kids laughing] Don't do that!

That's not what we're about!

What do you call that Shunka?

Let me see.

I gotta approve of this.

[audience laughter] [Audience] Ohhh!

[dreamlike music] <i>[Tyra] It just kind of made me</i> <i>feel amazed by all of it.</i> <i>I remember thinking, I</i> <i>was actually happy today.</i> <i>I was like smiling today.</i> <i>I was, I was happy because of them.</i> <i>And I remember just feeling</i> <i>like, I want to do that.</i> <i>I want to be able to be this</i> <i>person who like, everybody loves.</i> <i>From that point on, I knew</i> <i>I wanted to be a Bear.</i> <i>Ever since then.</i> Guess I've been up here so many times... and I didn't know what to say to you, but...

I finally know what I want to tell you.

And I just want you to know that even though you're not here anymore, that I still love you, and I think about you every day.

And you were my closest friend, my only friend, at the time, so it hurt really bad whenever you left.

Cause it kind of felt like I was alone after that.

But...

I'm finally at a point in my life where I think I can move on.

[heartwarming music] [laughter] <i>And you'll still be there,</i> <i>but I can finally live without</i> <i>having it hold me back.</i> <i>Because I finally get it.</i> <i>I've been keeping myself</i> <i>in this dark place</i> <i>because I didn't know where</i> <i>else to find you.</i> <i>But I don't need to</i> <i>choose when I die or not.</i> <i>It'll just happen whenever it's time.</i> And I shouldn't rush it till then.

Just live.

And I know that we were young, but I am so glad I met you.

You were the first real friend I ever had.

[sniffling] [Eileen] So we got a costume we want you to try.

And Shawnee-kwa is our... girl from New York City.

We want you to try it on.

[Tiny] Shawnee-kwa is very flirtatious.

- She's funny.

- She looks for men that she can dance with.

- This is her head.

- Show us some of your moves.

[Tyra] Do you guys know the twerk?

[laughing] [Tiny] Whip, and nae nae.

[Tyra] She's really roomy.

The dab.

- So you gotta walk like you're from New York City.

Yeah, there you go.

That was good.

[laughing] Yep, that was good.

- And when you bring that costume to life, it's how much energy you from yourself want to put into the costume.

And as Bears, we want to bring all the costumes to life.

And dance for the children.

- Oh my god!

[laughter] [dance beat begins] <i>[Tiny] You know, we've been</i> <i>through so much.</i> <i>Our people has been</i> <i>through so much.</i> <i>Every grandpa...</i> <i>[speaking Lakota] Gaka.</i> <i>Every grandma...</i> <i>[speaking Lakota] Unci.</i> <i>Every mother...</i> <i>[speaking Lakota] In.</i> <i>Every father...</i> <i>[speaking Lakota] At </i> <i>Every child, EVERY child out there</i> <i>has a story to tell.</i> <i>So no matter how minute</i> <i>they think they are...</i> <i>the power in their story</i> <i>has got to be told.</i> <i>[emotional orchestral music]</i> [Eileen] I want our youth to keep the fight going.

And to know that no matter how hard, we're going to show our strength.

And, uh, that's why I do it.

I want our future.

<i>I believe were uh...</i> <i>were gonna be okay.</i> <i>It's just a tough time right now.</i> [Tiny] The zombies.

Oh my gosh!

[adoringly] Oh my gosh!