Great Performances

-Next on "Great Performances"... -If music be the food of love, play on.

-Join us in New York's Central Park for "Twelfth Night", Shakespeare's comic odyssey about shipwrecked twins caught in a tale of mistaken identities, mischievous plots, and romantic confusion.

-I'll do my best to woo your lady.

Oh!

Yet a barful strife -- Whoe'er I woo, myself would be his wife.

-Give me my veil.

Come, throw it o'er my face.

We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy.

-[ All ] Mm-hmm.

-A Stellar ensemble cast features Peter Dinklage, Lupita Nyong'o, Sandra Oh, Daphne Rubin-Vega, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, and Moses Sumney.

- All the World's a Stage -The Public Theater's Free Shakespeare in the Park production of "Twelfth Night" starts right now.

[ Cheers and applause ] Major funding for "Great Performances" is provided by... ...and by contributions to your PBS station from viewers like you.

Thank you.

- All the world's a stage All the world's a stage And all the men and women Merely players Ooooooh Ooooooh They have their exits And their entrances And one man... Or woman... -Whoo!

- ...in their time Has many parts What you will - Ooooooh - What will you - Ooooooh - What you will - Ahhhhhhh - What will you - Ahhhhhhh [ Cheers and applause ] [ Conversing in Swahili ] And what should I do in Illyria?

My brother, he is in Elysium.

Perchance he is not drowned.

[ Speaking Swahili ] -It is, perchance, that you yourself were saved.

-[ Speaking Swahili ] And so perchance may he be.

-True Madam, and to comfort you with chance, assure yourself, after our ship did split, when you and those poor number saved with you hung on our driving boat, I saw your brother, most provident in peril, bind himself to a strong mast that lived upon the sea.

I saw him hold acquaintance with the waves so long as I could see.

-For saying so, there's gold.

[ Speaking Swahili ] Know'st thou this country?

[ Speaks Swahili ], madam, well, for I was bred and born not three hours' travel from this very place.

-Who governs here?

-A noble duke, in nature as in name.

-[ Speaks Swahili ] -Ah.

-What is his name?

-Orsino.

-Orsino.

I have heard my father name him.

He was a bachelor then.

And so is now, or was so very late, for but a month ago I went from hence, And then 'twas fresh in murmur that he did seek the love of fair Olivia.

-What's she?

-A virtuous maid, the daughter of a count that died some twelvemonth since, then leaving her in the protection of his son, her brother, who shortly also died, for whose dear love, they say, she hath abjured the company and sight of men.

-O, that I served that lady, and might not be delivered to the world till I had made mine own occasion mellow What my estate is.

-That were hard to compass because she will admit no kind of suit, no, not the Duke's.

-[ Speaks Swahili ], conceal me what I am.

I'll serve this duke.

Thou shalt disguise me as an eunuch to him.

It may be worth thy pains, for I can sing and speak to him in many sorts of music, that will allow you very worth his service.

What else may hap, to time I will commit.

Only shape thou thy silence to my wit.

-Be you his eunuch, and your mute I'll be.

-[ Speaks Swahili ] -Lead me on.

-If music be the food of love, play on.

[ Laughter ] Give me excess of it, that surfeiting the appetite may sicken and so die.

[ Grunting ] That strain again... ...it had a dying fall.

[ Inhales deeply ] O, it came o'er my ear like the sweet south that breathes upon a bank of violets, stealing and giving odor.

-Enough, no more!

-[ Music stops ] 'Tis not so sweet now as it was before.

-Will you go hunt, my lord?

-What, Curio?

-The hart.

-Why, so I do.

O, when mine eyes did see Olivia first, that instant was I turned into a hart, and my desires, like fell and cruel hounds, e'er since pursue me.

What news from her?

-So please my lord, I might not be admitted, but from her handmaid do return this answer -- the element itself till seven years' heat shall not behold her face at ample view, but like a cloistress she will veiled walk -- -[ Both laugh ] -All this to season a brother's dead love, which she would keep fresh and lasting in her sad remembrance.

-[ Laughing ] [ Laughter ] -O, she that hath a heart of that fine frame to pay this debt of love but to a brother.

-[ All ] Mm.

-How will she love when the rich golden shaft hath killed the flock of all affections else that live in her!

-[ All exclaiming ] -Away before me to sweet beds of flowers.

-Flowers?

-[ Exhales ] Flowers!

-[ All ] Flowers!

-Flowers!

-[ All ] Flowers!

-[ Shouts ] Flowers!

Love-thoughts lie rich when canopied with bowers.

Whoo!

[ Cheers and applause ] -By my troth, Sir Toby, you must come in earlier o' nights.

Your niece, my lady, takes great exceptions to your ill hours.

You must confine yourself within the modest limits of order.

-Confine?

I'll confine myself no finer than I am.

These clothes are good enough for drinking.

So be these boots.

They be not, let them hang themselves in their own straps.

-That quaffing and drinking will undo you.

I heard my lady talk of it yesterday, and of a foolish knight that you brought in one night here to be her wooer.

-Who, Sir Andrew Aguecheek?

-Ay, he.

-He's as tall a man as any 's in Illyria.

-He's a very fool and a prodigal.

By this hand they are scoundrels that say so of him.

Who are they?

-They that add, moreover, he's drunk nightly in your company.

-With drinking healths to my niece.

I'll drink to her as long as there is a passage in my throat and drink in Illyria.

[ Toby and Andrew shouting ] Here comes Sir Andrew Agueface.

[ Cheers and applause ] - Sir Toby Belch!

-[ Both ] How now, Sir Toby Belch?

-Sweet Sir Andrew!

-Bless you, fair shrew.

-And you too, sir.

-Accost, Sir Andrew, accost!

-What's that?

-My niece's chambermaid.

-Dear Mistress Accost, I desire better acquaintance.

-My name is Mary, sir.

-Dear Mistress Mary Accost.

-You mistake, knight.

"Accost" is front her, board her, woo her, assail her.

-By my troth, I would not undertake her in this company.

Is that the meaning of "accost"?

-Fare you well, gentlemen.

-An thou let part so, Sir Andrew, would thou mightst never draw again.

-An you part so, mistress, I would I might never draw again.

Fair lady... [ Laughter ] ...do you think you have fools in hand?

-Sir, I have not you by th' hand.

-Marry, but you shall have, and here's my hand.

-[ Scoffs ] Now, sir, thought is free.

I pray you, bring your hand to th' butt'ry bar and let it drink.

-Wherefore, sweetheart?

What's your metaphor?

-It's dry, sir.

-Why, I think so.

I am not such an ass but I can keep my hand dry.

-Marry, now I let go your hand I am barren.

[ Gasps ] Uh, uh.

O, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo.

[ Chuckles ] Ah.

Eek!

Eek!

Eek!

Eek!

Eek!

[ Laughter ] -O knight, when did I see thee so put down?

Methinks sometimes I have no more wit than a Christian or an ordinary man has, but I am a great eater of beef, and I believe that does harm to my wit.

-No question.

-An I thought that, I'd forswear it.

Jesus!

I'll ride home tomorrow, Sir Toby.

Your niece will not be seen or, if she be, it's four to one she'll none of me.

The count himself here hard by woos her.

-She'll none o' th' count.

She'll not match above her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit -- I have heard her swear 't.

Tut, there's life in 't, man.

-I'll stay a month longer.

I am a fellow o' th' strangest mind i' th' world.

I delight in masques and revels sometimes altogether.

-Art thou good at these kickshawses, knight?

-[ Laughs ] As any man in Illyria.

-What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight?

-Faith, I can cut a caper.

-Wherefore are these things hid?

Wherefore have these gifts a curtain before 'em?

-[ Shouts ] Shall we set about some revels?

-What shall we do else?

Were we not born under Taurus?

-Taurus?

That's sides and heart.

-No, sir, it is legs and thighs -- let me see thee caper.

[ Laughs ] Higher!

Ha, ha, excellent!

[ Cheers and applause ] -[ Clears throat ] If the Count continue these favors towards you, Cesario, you are like to be much advanced.

He hath known you but three days, and already you are no stranger.

-Is he inconstant, sir, in his favors?

-No, believe me.

-Here comes the Count.

-Cesario.

-On your attendance, my lord -- here.

-Stand you awhile aloof.

-[ Clapping ] -Let's go, big boss man.

-How now!

-Whoo!

-[ Gentlemen exclaiming ] -Yeah!

-Cesario!

-Arghhh!

[ Laughter ] -[ Breathing heavily ] -I have unclasped to thee the book even of my secret soul.

Therefore, good youth, address thy gait unto her, Be not denied access.

-Sure, my noble lord.

-Be clamorous and leap all civil bounds rather than make unprofited return.

-[ Shouting ] Oh!

-[ Laughs ] -Say I do speak with her, my lord, what then?

-O, then unfold the passion of my love, Surprise her with discourse of my dear faith.

It shall become thee well to act my woes.

She will attend it better in thy youth.

-I think not so, my lord.

-Dear lad, believe it, for they shall yet belie thy happy years that say thou art a man.

Diana's lip Is not more smooth and rubious, thy small pipe and all is semblative a woman's part.

[ Clears throat ] Prosper well in this and thou shalt live as freely as thy lord, to call his fortunes thine.

-I'll do my best to woo your lady.

Oh!

Yet a barful strife, whoe'er I woo, myself would be his wife.

-My lady will hang thee for thy absence.

-Let her hang me.

He that is well hanged in this world needs to fear no colors.

-Peace, you rogue, no more o' that.

Here comes my lady now -- make your excuse wisely you were best.

[ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] - God bless thee, lady!

-Take the fool away.

-[ Claps hands ] -Do you not hear?

Take away the Lady.

-Go to, you're a dry Fool.

I'll no more of you.

-The Lady bade take away the Fool.

Therefore, I say again, take her away.

-Sir, I bade them take away you.

-Good madonna, give me leave to prove you a fool.

-Can you do it?

-Dexteriously, good madonna.

-Make your proof.

-I must catechize you for it, madonna.

-Well, sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide your proof.

-[ Claps hands ] - Good madonna, why mourn'st thou?

-Good fool, for my brother's death.

- I think his soul is in hell, madonna -I know his soul is in heaven, fool.

-The more fool, madonna, to mourn for your brother's soul, being in heaven.

Take the fool away -What think you of this fool, Malvolio, doth he not mend?

-I marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a barren rascal.

I saw him put down the other day with an ordinary fool that has no more brain than a stone.

-[ Laughs ] -Look, look, look you now, he's out of his guard already.

Unless you laugh or minister occasion to him, he is gagged.

-O, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio, and taste with a distempered appetite.

There is no slander in an allowed fool, though he do nothing but rail.

-Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman much desires to speak with you.

-From the Count Orsino, is it?

-I know not, madam.

-Who of my people hold him in delay?

-Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman.

-Fetch him off, I pray you, he speaks nothing but madman.

Fie on him.

Go you, Malvolio.

If it be a suit from the Count, I am sick, or not at home.

What you will to dismiss it.

Now you see, sir, oh, how your fooling grows old, and people dislike it.

By mine honor, half drunk.

What is he at the gate, uncle?

-'Tis a gentleman.

-A gentleman?

What gentleman?

-'Tis a gentleman there.

[ Belches ] A plague o' these pickled herring!

How now, sot?

-Good Sir Toby.

-Uncle, uncle, how have you come so early by this lethargy?

-[ Women screaming ] -Lechery?

I defy lechery.

There's one at the gate.

-Ay, marry, what is he?

-[ Groans ] Let him be the devil an he will, I care not.

Give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one.

Ayyy!

[ Laughter ] -Go thou, seek the crowner, and let him sit o' my uncle, for he's in the third degree of drink -- he's drowned.

Go look after him.

-He is but mad yet, madonna, and the fool will look to the madman.

-Madam, yon young fellow swears he will speak with you.

I told him you were sick.

He takes on him to understand so much, and therefore comes to speak with you.

I told him you were asleep.

He seems to have a foreknowledge of that, as well, and therefore comes to speak with you.

What is to be said to him, lady?

He's fortified against all denial.

-Tell him he shall not speak with me.

-Has been told so, and he says he'll stand at your door like a sheriff's post and be the supporter to a bench, but that he will speak with you.

-What kind o' man is he?

-Why, of mankind.

-What manner of man?

-Of very ill manner, he will speak to you, will you or no.

-Of what personage and years is he?

-Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough for a boy, as a squash is before 'tis a peascod, or a codling when 'tis almost an apple.

'Tis with him in standing water between boy and man.

He is very well favored, and he speaks very shrewishly.

One would think his mother's milk were scarce out of him.

-Let him approach.

Call in my gentlewoman.

-Gentlewoman, my lady calls.

-Give me my veil.

Come, throw it o'er my face.

We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy.

-[ Women ] Mm-hmm.

[ Laughter ] -The honorable lady of the house, which is she?

-Speak to me, I answer for her.

Your will?

-[ Breathing rhythmically ] [ Beatboxing ] [ Laughter ] Most radiant, exquisite And unmatchable beauty I pray you, tell me if this be the lady of the house, for I never saw her.

I would be loath to cast away my speech, for, besides that it is excellently well penned, I have taken great pains to con it.

-Whence came you, sir?

-Good gentle one, give me modest assurance if you be the lady of the house, that I may proceed in my speech.

-Are you a comedian?

-No, my profound heart.

And yet I swear I am not that I play.

Are you the lady of the house?

-If I do not usurp myself, I am.

-Most certain if you are she you do usurp yourself, for what is yours to bestow is not yours to reserve.

But this is from my commission.

I will on with my speech in your praise, and then show you the heart of my message.

-Come to what's important in 't -- I forgive you the praise.

-[ Women ] Mm-hmm.

-It alone concerns your ear.

-What are you?

[ Gasps ] What would you?

-What I am and what I would are as secret as maidenhead -- to your ears, divinity -- to any other's, profanation.

-Give us the place alone, we will hear this divinity.

[ Claps hands ] [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] Now sir, what is your text?

-[ Beatboxes ] Most sweet lady -A comfortable doctrine and much may be said of it.

Where lies your text?

-In Orsino's bosom.

-In his bosom?

In what chapter of his bosom?

-To answer by the method, in the first of his heart.

-O, I have read it -- it is heresy.

Have you no more to say?

-Good madam, let me see your face.

-Have you any commission from your lord to negotiate with my face?

You are now out of your text.

But we will draw the curtain and show you the picture.

Look you, sir.

[ Cheers and applause ] Such a one I was this present.

Is 't not well done?

-Excellently done, if God did all.

-'Tis in grain, sir, 'twill endure wind and weather.

-Lady, you are the cruel'st she alive If you will lead these graces to the grave and leave the world no copy.

-O sir, I will not be so hard-hearted!

I will give out divers schedules of my beauty.

It shall be inventoried, and every particle and utensil labelled to my will, as item, two lips, indifferent red -- item, two eyes, with lids to them -- item, one neck, one chin, and so forth.

Were you sent hither to praise me?

-I see you what you are.

You are too proud.

But if you were the devil you are fair.

My lord and master loves you.

-Your lord does know my mind -- I cannot love him.

He might have took his answer long ago.

-If I did love you in my master's flame, with such a suffering, such a deadly life, in your denial I would find no sense, I would not understand it.

-Why, what would you?

-Make me a willow cabin at your gate and call upon my soul within the house -- write loyal cantos of contemned love and sing them loud even in the dead of night.

Hallow your name to the reverberate hills and make the babbling gossip of the air Cry out "Olivia!"

O, you should not rest between the elements of air and earth but you should pity me.

-You might do much.

What is your parentage?

-Above my fortunes, yet my state is well.

I am a gentleman.

[ Clears throat ] -Get you to your lord.

I cannot love him -- let him send no more, Unless perchance you come to me again to tell me how he takes it.

Fare you well.

I thank you for your pains.

Spend this for me.

-I am no fee'd post, lady -- keep your purse.

My master, not myself, lacks recompense.

Love make his heart of flint that you shall love, and let your fervor, like my master's, be placed in contempt.

Farewell, fair cruelty.

-"What is your parentage?"

"Above my fortunes, yet my state is well -- I am a gentleman."

I'll be sworn thou art -- thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions, and spirit do give thee fivefold blazon.

Not too fast!

Soft, soft -- [ Laughter ] Unless the master were the man.

How now?

Even so quickly may one catch the plague?

Methinks I feel this youth's perfections with an invisible and subtle stealth to creep in at mine eyes.

Well, let it be.

What ho, Malvolio.

-Here, madam, at your service.

-Run after that same peevish messenger.

He left this ring behind him, would I or not.

Tell him I'll none of it.

Desire him not to flatter with his lord, nor hold him up with hopes -- I am not for him.

If that the youth will come this way tomorrow, I'll give him reasons for 't.

Hie thee, Malvolio.

-Madam, I will.

-I do I know not what, and fear to find mine eye too great a flatterer for my mind.

Fate, show thy force, ourselves we do not owe.

What is decreed must be -- and be this so.

[ Cheers and applause ] -Will you stay no longer, nor will you not that I go with you.

-By your patience, no.

I shall crave of you your leave that I may bear my evils alone.

It were a bad recompense for your love to lay any of them on you.

-Let me yet know of you whither you are bound.

-Antonio.

My name is Sebastian, which I called Rodrigo.

My father Was that Sebastian of Messaline whom I know you have heard of.

He left behind him myself and a sister, both born in an hour.

Some hour before you took me from the breach of the sea was my sister drowned.

-Alas the day!

-A lady, sir, though it was said she much resembled me, was yet of many accounted beautiful.

She bore a mind that envy could not but call fair.

She is drowned already, sir, with salt water, though I seem to drown her remembrance again with more.

-Pardon me, sir, your bad entertainment.

-O good Antonio, forgive me your trouble.

-If you will not murder me for my love, let me be your servant.

-If you will not undo what you have done, that is, kill him whom you have recovered, desire it not.

My bosom is full of kindness, Fare you well at once.

I am bound to the Count Orsino's court.

-I have many enemies in Orsino's court, else would I very shortly see thee there.

But come what may I do adore thee so that danger shall seem sport, and I will go.

[ Cheers and applause ] -[ Breathing heavily ] [ Laughter ] [ Breathing heavily continues ] Were not you e'en now with the Countess Olivia?

-Even now, sir.

-She returns this ring to you, sir.

You might have saved me my pains to have taken it away yourself.

Oh, and one thing more, that you be never so hardy to come again in his affairs unless it be to report your lord's taking of this.

Receive it so.

-She took the ring of me, I'll none of it.

-[ Growling ] Come, sir, you peevishly threw it to her, her will is it should be so returned.

If it be worth stooping for, there it lies in your eye -- if not, be it his that finds it.

[ Laughter, applause ] -I left no ring with her.

[ Speaking Swahili ] [ Speaks Swahili ] my outside has not charmed her.

Wah!

She loves me.

[ Speaks Swahili ] None of my lord's ring?

[ Speaks Swahili ] he sent her none.

[ Speaks Swahili ] the man.

[ Laughter ] If it be so, as 'tis, [Speaks Swahili], she were better love a dream.

[ Speaks Swahili ], he loves her dearly, [speaks Swahili], fond as much on him, [speaks Swahili], mistaken, seems to dote on [speaks Swahili].

[ Speaking Swahili ] As I am man, my state is desperate for my [speaks Swahili] love.

As I am woman, [speaks Swahili].

What thriftless sighs shall poor Olivia breathe!

Ah-ah!

Time, thou must untangle this, not I.

[ Speaks Swahili ] too hard a knot for me t' untie.

[ Cheers and applause ] [ Laughter ] -Approach, Sir Andrew.

Not to be abed after midnight is to be up betimes.

I know to be up late is to be up late.

Let us eat and drink.

-Ah!

Here's the Fool, i' faith.

-How now, my hearts?

-Welcome, ass!

Come on, let's have a song.

-Would you have a love-song or a song of good life?

-A love song, a love song.

-Ay, ay, I care not for good life.

- O mistress mine Where are you roaming?

O, stay and hear!

Your truelove's coming That can sing both high and low Trip no further Pretty sweeting Journeys end In lovers meeting Every wise man's son doth know What is love?

'Tis not hereafter Present mirth Hath present laughter What's to come is still unsure In delay there lies no plenty Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty Youth's a stuff will not [ Vocalizing ] Endure -[ Snapping fingers ] [ Cheers and applause ] -A mellifluous voice, as I am true knight.

-Ha!

Shall we make the welkin dance indeed?

Shall we rouse the night owl in a catch that will draw three souls out of one weaver?

Shall we do that?

-An you love me, let's do 't.

Begin, fool.

It begins, Hold thy peace -I shall never begin if I hold my peace.

-[ Laughs ] Good, i'faith.

Begin.

Come on.

-[ Both ] Hold thy peace -[ All ] Hold thy peace Hold thy peace -This is too high.

Hold thy [loudly] peace -[ Shouts ] Peace -[ High-pitched ] Peace -What a caterwauling do you keep here!

-[ Coughing ] -If my lady have not called up her steward Malvolio and bid him turn you out of doors, never trust me.

- Three merry men be we -[ Laughs ] -[ Both ] There dwelt a man in Babylon Lady, whoo, lady Tillyvally, lady, whoo -[ Shrieks ] Lady, whoo - Lady -My masters, are you mad?

Or what are you?

[ Blower whirring ] [ Laughter ] -[ Coughing ] -Have you no wit, manners, nor honesty but to gabble like tinkers at this time of night?

Do you make an ale-house of my lady's house?

Is there no respect of place, persons, nor time in you?

-[ Gasps loudly ] [ Shouts ] We did keep time, sir, in our catches.

-[ Laughs ] -Feste, Andrew, Toby: Sneck up!

-Sir Toby, I must be round with you.

My lady bade me tell you that, though she harbors you as her kinsman, she's nothing allied to your disorders.

If you can separate yourself and your misdemeanors, you are welcome to the house -- if not, an it would please you to take leave of her, she is very willing to bid you farewell.

-[ Gasps ] Farewell, dear heart Since I must needs be gone -[ Laughs ] -Nay, good Sir Toby.

- His eyes do show his days are almost done -Is 't even so?

- But I will never die Sir Toby, there you lie -This is much credit to you.

- Shall I bid him go, and spare not?

- O no, no, no, no, no -Feste and Andrew: You dare not.

-Art thou any more than a steward?

Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?

A stoup of wine, Maria.

-Mistress Mary, if you prized my lady's favor at anything more than contempt, you would not give means for this uncivil rule.

She shall know of it, by this hand.

-Go shake your ears!

-'Twere as good a deed as to drink when a man's a-hungry, to challenge him the field and then to break promise with him and make a fool of him.

Do 't, knight.

I'll write thee a challenge.

Or I'll deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth.

-Good Sir Toby, be patient for tonight.

For Monsieur Malvolio, let me alone with him.

If I do not gull him and make him a common recreation, do not think I have wit enough to lie straight in my bed.

I know I can do it.

-Splash.

Sorry.

[ Laughter ] Possess us, possess us, tell us something of him.

Marry, sir, sometimes he is so crammed with excellencies that it is his grounds of faith that all that look on him love him.

And on that vice in him will my revenge find notable cause to work.

What wilt thou do?

I will drop in his way some obscure epistles of love, wherein he shall find himself most feelingly personated.

I can write very like my lady your niece -- on a forgotten matter, we can hardly make distinction of our hands.

-Excellent!

I smell a device.

-I have 't in my nose, too.

-He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop, that they come from my niece, and that she's in love with him.

-O, 'twill be admirable!

-Sport royal, I warrant you.

I will plant you where he shall find the letter.

Observe his construction of it.

For this night, to bed, and dream on the event.

Farewell.

[ Cheers and applause ] -Before me, she's a good wench.

-She's a beagle true bred, and one that adores me.

What o' that?

-I was adored once, too.

-Let's to bed.

Thou hadst need send for more money.

-Oh!

Oh!

-[ Both ] Oh!

Oh!

'Tis too late to go to bed now.

Whoo!

-Good night!

-Whoo!

[ Applause ] [ Cheering ] -Come hither, boy.

If ever thou shalt love, in the sweet pangs of it remember [winces] me -- for such as I am, all true lovers are, unstaid and skittish in all motions else save in the constant image of the creature that is beloved.

How dost thou like this tune?

-It gives a very echo to the seat where love is throned.

-Thou dost speak masterly.

My life upon 't, young though thou art, thine eye hath stayed upon some favor that it loves.

Hath it not, boy?

-A little, by your favor.

-What kind of woman is 't?

-Of your complexion.

-She is not worth thee, then.

What years, i' faith?

-About your years, my lord.

-Come, let's have a song.

-Are you ready, sir?

-Ay.

[ Singing in Swahili ] -[ Singing in Swahili ] [ Triangle dings ] [ Cheers and applause ] -Let all the rest give place.

Once more, Cesario, get thee to yond same sovereign cruelty.

-But if she cannot love you, sir -- -I cannot be so answered.

-Sooth, but you must.

Say that some lady, as perhaps there is, hath for your love as great a pang of heart as you have for Olivia.

You cannot love her -- You tell her so.

Must she not then be answered?

-There is no woman's sides can bide the beating of so strong a passion as love doth give my heart -- no woman's heart so big, they lack retention.

But mine is all as hungry as the sea, and can digest as much.

Make no compare between that love a woman can bear me and that I owe Olivia.

-Ay, but I know -- -What dost thou know?

-Too well what love women to men may owe.

In faith, they are as true of heart as we.

My father had a daughter loved a man, As it might be, perhaps, were I a woman, I should your lordship.

-And what's her history?

-A blank, my lord.

She never told her love, But let concealment like a worm i' th' bud feed on her damask cheek.

She pined in thought, and with a green and yellow melancholy she sat like patience on a monument, smiling at grief.

Was not this love indeed?

We men may say more, swear more, but indeed our shows are more than will, for still we prove much in our vows, but little in our love.

But died thy sister of her love, my boy?

I am all the daughters of my father's house, And all the brothers too -- and yet I know not.

Sir, shall I to this lady?

-Ay.

That's the theme.

To her in haste.

Give her this jewel -- say my love can give no place, bide no denay.

-Come thy ways, Signior Fabian.

-Nay, I'll come.

If I lose a scruple of this sport let me be boiled to death with melancholy.

-Wouldst thou not be glad to have the rascally sheep-biter come by some notable shame?

-I would exult, man.

You know he brought me out o' favor with my lady about a bearbaiting here.

-To anger him, we'll have the bear again, and we shall fool him black and blue, shall we not, Sir Andrew?

-An we do not, it is pity of our lives.

-Here comes the little villain.

-Get ye all three into the box-tree.

Malvolio's coming down this walk.

He has been yonder i' the sun practicing behavior to his own shadow this half hour.

Observe him for the love of mockery, for I know this letter will make a contemplative idiot of him.

Close, in the name of jesting!

-'Tis but fortune, all is fortune.

Maria once told me she did affect me, and I have heard herself come thus near, that should she fancy it should be one of my complexion.

To be Count Malvolio.

[ Laughter ] Having been three months married to her, and I in my state -- - in my branched velvet gown, having come from a day-bed where I have left Olivia sleeping.

-Ah, rogue!

-Pistol him, pistol him!

-And then to have the humor of state, and after a demure travel of regard -- telling them I know my place, as I would they should do theirs -- to ask for my kinsman Toby.

Seven of my people, with an obedient start, make out for him.

I frown the while and perchance wind my watch, or play with my -- some rich jewel.

[ Laughter ] Toby approaches, curtsies there to me -- I extend my hand to him thus, quenching my familiar smile with an austere regard of control -- saying "Uncle Toby, my fortunes, having cast me on your niece, give me this prerogative of speech."

-What, what?

-"You must amend your drunkenness."

-Out, scab!

-Nay, patience, or we break the sinews of our plot.

[ Laughter ] "Besides, you waste the treasure of your time with a that foolish knight --" -That's me, I warrant you.

-One Sir Andrew.

-I knew 'twas I, for many do call me fool.

[ Mimicking birds cooing, calling ] [ Mimicking bird cawing ] Hmm.

What employment have we here?

By my life, this is my lady's hand.

To the unknown beloved, this, and my good wishes.

Her very phrases!

By your leave, wax.

Soft.

To whom should this be?

-This wins him, liver and all.

-Jove knows I love, but who?

Lips, do not move, no man must know.

"No man must know."

What follows?

The numbers altered.

"No man must know."

[ Gasps ] If this should be thee, Malvolio?

-Hang thee!

-I may command where I adore, but silence, like a Lucrece knife, with bloodless stroke my heart doth gore.

M.O.A.I.

doth sway my life.

-A riddle!

-Excellent wench, say I.

-I may command where I adore.

Why, she may command me.

I serve her, she is my lady.

And the end -- what should that alphabetical position portend?

If I could only make this resemble something in me!

Soft.

M.O.A.I.

-O ay, make up that.

He is now at a cold scent.

-[ Shouts ] "M."

Malvolio "M."

That begins my name!

M.

-[ Laughs ] Did not I say he would work it out?

-But there is no consonancy in the sequel that suffers under probation.

"A" should follow, but "O" does.

-I'll cudgel him and make him cry "O."

-And then "I" comes behind.

-Ay, an you had any eye behind you, you'd might see more detraction at your heels than fortunes ahead of you.

-M.O.A.I.

This simulation is not as the former.

And yet to crush it a little it would bow to me, for every one of these letters is in my name.

Softly!

Here follows prose.

If this fall into thy hand, revolve.

In my stars I am above thee, but be not afraid of greatness.

Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.

Be opposite with a kinsman, surly with servants.

She thus advises thee that sighs for thee.

Remember who commended thy yellow stockings and wished to see thee ever cross-gartered -- I say remember.

Go to, thou art made, if thou desir'st to be so.

Farewell.

She that would alter services with thee, The Fortunate Unhappy.

This is open.

I will be proud, I will read politic authors, I will baffle Sir Toby, I will wash off gross acquaintance, I will be point-devise the very man.

I do not now fool myself to let imagination jade me -- for every reason excites me to this, that my lady loves me.

[ Cheers and applause ] I am happy.

I will be strange, stout, in yellow stockings and cross-gartered even with the swiftness of putting on.

Jove and my stars be praised!

-[ Gasps ] -Yet here is a postscript.

Thou canst not choose but know who I am.

If thou entertain'st my love, let it appear in thy...smiling.

Thy smiles become thee well.

Therefore in my presence still smile, dear my sweet, I prithee.

Jove, I thank thee.

I will smile.

[ Laughter ] I will do everything that thou wilt have me.

[ Mimicking birds cawing ] -My noble gull-catcher.

[ Cheers and applause ] -Wilt thou set thy foot o' my neck?

-Or o' mine either?

-I could marry this wench for this device.

-Ah, so could I, too.

-Why, thou hast put him in such a dream that when the image of it leaves him he must go mad.

-If you will see the fruits of the sport, mark his first approach before my lady.

He will come to her in yellow stockings, and 'tis a color she abhors, and cross-gartered, a fashion she detests.

If you will see it, follow me.

-To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of wit.

-I'll make one, too.

[ Cheers and applause ] -[ Both grunt ] -Save thee, friend, and thy music.

Art thou the Lady Olivia's fool?

-No indeed, sir, the Lady Olivia has no folly.

She will keep no fool, sir, till she be married.

I am indeed not her fool, but her corrupter of words.

-I saw thee late at the Count Orsino's.

-Foolery, sir, [sings] does walk about the orb Like the sun It shines everywhere -Hold, there's expenses for thee.

-Now Jove in his next commodity of hair send thee a beard.

-By my troth I'll tell thee, I am almost sick for one.

Though I would not have it grow on my chin.

-Who you are and what you would are out of my welkin.

-Is thy lady within?

-My lady is within, sir.

I will conster to them whence you come.

-[ Grunts ] -[ Both ] Bow!

-Save you, gentleman.

-And you, sir.

-[ Cellphone chimes ] -[ Automated voice ] Now you try.

[ Speaking French ] Dieu vous garde, monsieur.

-[ Speaking French ] Dieu vous garde, monsieur.

-[ Speaking French ] Et vous aussi -- votre serviteur.

-Will you encounter the house?

My niece is desirous you should enter.

-I am bound to your niece, sir.

-Taste your legs, sir -- put them to motion.

-My legs do better understand me, sir, than I understand what you mean by bidding me taste my legs but we are prevented.

-Milady.

-Let the garden door be shut, and leave me to my hearing.

Give me your hand, sir.

-My duty, madam, and most humble service.

-What is your name?

-Cesario is your servant's name.

-My servant, sir?

'Twas never merry world since lowly feigning was called compliment.

You're servant to the Count Orsino, youth.

-And he is yours, and his must needs be yours.

Your servant's servant is your servant, madam.

-For him, I think not on him.

For his thoughts, would they were blanks rather than filled with me.

-Dear lady -- -Give me leave, beseech you.

I did send, after the last enchantment you did here, a ring in chase of you.

So did I abuse myself, my servant, and, I fear me, you.

Under your hard construction must I sit, to force that on you in a shameful cunning which you knew none of yours.

What might you think?

-I pity you.

-That's a degree to love.

-No, not a grize, for 'tis a vulgar proof that very oft we pity enemies.

-O world, how apt the poor are to be proud!

Be not afraid, good youth, I will not have you, and yet when wit and youth is come to harvest, your wife is like to reap a proper man.

There lies your way.

-Grace and good disposition attend your ladyship.

Will you nothing, madam, to my lord by me?

-[ Scoffs ] Stay -- I prithee, tell me what thou think'st of me.

-That you do think you are not what you are.

-If I think so, I think the same of you.

-Then think you right.

I am not what I am.

-I would you were as I would have you be.

-Would it be better, madam, than I am?

I wish it might, for now I am your fool.

-O, what a deal of scorn looks beautiful in the contempt and anger of his lip.

A murd'rous guilt shows itself not more soon than love that would seem hid.

Love's night is noon.

Cesario, by the roses of the spring, by maidhood, honor, truth and everything, I love thee so that maugre all thy pride nor wit nor reason can my passion hide.

Do not extort thy reasons from this clause -- for that I woo, thou therefore hast no cause.

But rather reason thus with reason fetter -- Love sought is good, but given unsought is better.

-By innocence I swear, and by my youth, I have one heart, one bosom and one truth, and that no woman has, nor never none shall mistress be of it, save I alone.

And so adieu, good madam -- never more will I my master's tears to you deplore.

-Yet come again, for thou perhaps mayst move that heart which now abhors to like his love.

[ Applause ] -No, faith, I'll not stay a jot longer.

-Thy reason, give thy reason.

-You must give your reason, Sir Andrew.

-Marry, I saw your niece do more favors for the count's servingman than ever she bestowed upon me.

-Did she see thee the while, old boy?

Tell me that.

-As plain as I see you now.

-Well, this was a great argument of love in her toward you.

-'Slight!

Will you make an ass o' me?

-I will prove it legitimate, sir.

She did show favor to the youth in your sight only to exasperate you, to awaken your dormouse valor.

You should have then accosted her with some excellent jests, fire-new from the mint, you should have banged the youth into dumbness.

-An 't be any way, it must be with valor, for policy I hate.

-Why, then, build thy fortune upon the basis of valor.

Challenge the count's youth to fight with him.

Hurt him in eleven places -- [ Speaking gibberish ] My niece shall take note of it.

And assure thyself there is no love-broker in the world can more prevail in man's commendation with woman than report of valor.

-There is no way but this, Sir Andrew.

-Will either of you bear me a challenge to him?

-Go, write it in a martial hand, be curst and brief.

Taunt him with the license of ink.

About it.

-Where shall I find you?

I'll call thee.

Go.

-[ Screams ] -[ Toby and Fabian scream ] -[ Laughs ] This is a dear manikin to you, Sir Toby.

-O, I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand strong or so.

-We shall have a rare letter from him.

But you'll not deliver 't?

-Never trust me then -- and by all means stir on the youth to an answer.

I think oxen and wain-ropes cannot hale them together.

For Andrew, if he were opened and you find so much blood in his liver as would clog the foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of th' anatomy.

-[ Chuckles ] And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no great presage of cruelty.

Look where the youngest wren of mine comes.

-If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourselves into stitches, follow me.

Yond gull Malvolio is turned heathen, -a very [shouts] renegado.

-[ All laugh ] He's in yellow stockings.

-And cross-gartered?

-Most villainously.

He does obey every point of the letter that I dropped to betray him.

You have not seen such a thing as 'tis.

I know my lady will strike him.

If she do, he'll smile and take 't for a great favor.

-Come, bring us where he is.

-I would not by my will have troubled you, But, since you make your pleasure of your pains I will no further chide you.

-I could not stay behind you.

My desire, more sharp than filed steel, did spur me forth.

And not all love to see you -- though so much as might have drawn one to a longer voyage -- but jealousy what might befall your travel, being skill-less in these parts, which to a stranger, unguided and unfriended, often prove rough and unhospitable.

My willing love, the rather by these arguments of fear, set forth in your pursuit.

-My kind Antonio, I can no other answer make but thanks, and thanks, and ever thanks -- and oft good turns are shuffled off with such uncurrent pay.

But were my worth as is my conscience firm, you should find better dealing.

What's to do?

Shall we go see the relics of this town?

-Tomorrow, sir -- best first go see your lodging.

-I am not weary, and 'tis long to night.

I pray you, let us satisfy our eyes with the memorials and the things of fame that do renown this city.

-Would you'd pardon me.

I do not without danger walk these streets.

Once in a sea fight 'gainst the count I did some service, of such note indeed that were I ta'en here it would scarce be answered.

-Belike you slew great number of his people?

-Th' offense is not of such a bloody nature, albeit the quality of the time and quarrel might well have given us bloody argument.

Only myself stood out, for which if I be lapsed in this place I shall pay dear.

-Do not then walk too open.

-It doth not fit me.

Hold, sir, here's my purse.

In the south suburbs, at the Elephant, Is best to lodge.

I will bespeak our diet whiles you beguile the time with viewing of the town.

-Why I your purse?

-Haply your eye shall light upon some toy you desire to purchase -- and your store, I think, is not for idle markets, sir.

-I'll be your purse-bearer, and leave you for an hour.

-To th'elephant.

-I do remember.

-I have sent after him.

He says he'll come.

How shall I feast him?

What bestow of him?

For youth is bought more oft than begged or borrowed.

I speak too loud.

Where's Malvolio?

He is sad and civil, and suits well for a servant with my fortunes.

-He's coming, madam, but in very strange manner.

He is sure possessed, madam.

-Why, what's the matter?

Does he rave?

-No, madam, he does nothing but smile.

Your ladyship were best to have some guard about you if he come, for sure the man is tainted in's wits.

-Go call him hither.

I am as mad as he, If sad and merry madness equal be.

How now, Malvolio?

-Sweet lady, ho, ho!

-Smil'st thou?

I sent for thee upon a sad occasion.

-Sad, lady?

I could be sad.

For this does make some obstruction in the blood, this cross-gartering, but what of that?

-Why, how dost thou, man?

What is the matter with thee?

-Not black in my mind, though yellow in my legs.

-Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio?

-To bed?

Ay, sweetheart, I'll come to thee.

-God comfort thee.

Why dost thou smile so and kiss thy hand so oft?

-Why appear will you with this ridiculous boldness before my lady?

-"Be not afraid of greatness" -- 'twas well writ.

-What mean'st thou by that, Malvolio?

-"Some are born great" -- -Ha?

-"Some achieve greatness."

-What sayst thou?

-"And some have greatness thrust upon them."

-Heaven restore thee!

-"Remember who commended thy yellow stockings" -- -Thy yellow stockings?

-"And wished to see thee ever cross-gartered."

-Cross-gartered?

-"Go to, thou art made if thou desir'st to be so."

-Why, this is very midsummer madness!

-[ Hisses ] -The young gentleman of the Count Orsino's is returned.

I could hardly entreat him back.

He attends your Ladyship's pleasure.

-I'll come to him.

Good Ma-- Good Ma-- Ha, Good Maria, let this fellow be looked to.

Where is my Uncle Toby?

Let some of my people have a special care of him -- I would not have him miscarry for the half of my dowry.

-O ho, do you come near me now?

No worse man than Sir Toby to look to me!

This concurs directly with the letter.

I have limed her, but it is Jove's doing and Jove make me thankful!

And when she went away now, "Let this fellow be looked to."

"Fellow", not "Malvolio", nor after my degree, but "fellow"!

O, everything adheres together that nothing that can be can come between me and the full prospect of my hopes.

-We must deal gently with him.

-How do you, Malvolio?

How is 't with you?

O, what, man, defy the devil!

-Do you know what you say?

-La you, an you speak ill of the devil, how he takes it at heart.

Pray God he be not bewitched!

-How now, mistress?

[ Screaming ] -Prithee hold thy peace, this is not the way.

Do you not see you move him?

Let me alone with him.

-Gently, gently, sir Toby.

The Devil is rough and won't be roughly used.

-Why how now, my bawcock?

Ay, biddy, come with me.

What, man, 'tis not for gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan!

-Get him to pray!

-My prayers, mate.

[ All scream ] -O, nay!

I warrant you.

He will not hear of godliness!

-O, go hang yourselves, all!

You are idle, shallow things.

I'm none of your element.

-[ Gasps ] -You shall know more hereafter.

-[ Gasps ] Is 't possible?!

-[ Laughing ] If this were played upon a stage now, I could condemn it as improbable fiction!

[ Laughs ] -Why, we shall make him mad indeed.

-The house will be the quieter.

-Come.

We'll have him in a dark room and bound.

My niece is already in the belief that he's mad!

I... Ah, but see, but see!

-More matter for a May morning!

-Here's the challenge!

Read it!

I warrant there's vinegar and pepper in 't.

-Is 't so saucy?

-Ay, is 't!

Do but read.

-Give me.

"Youth."

-No, no, no, no.

"Youth!!!"

-"Youth!!!

Whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow."

-Good, and valiant.

-"Wonder not nor admire not in thy mind why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for it."

-Good note.

Keeps you from the blow of the law.

-"Thou com'st to the Lady Olivia, and in my sight she uses thee kindly.

But thou liest in thy throat -- that is not the matter I challenge thee for.

Fare thee well, and God have mercy upon one of our souls.

Thy friend as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy, Andrew Aguecheek!"

If this letter move him not, his legs cannot.

I'll give 't him.

-You may have very fit occasion for it.

He is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart.

-Go, Sir Andrew!

And so soon as ever thou seest him, draw and, as thou draw'st, swear horrible.

Away!

-Nay!

Let me alone for swearing!

Foot licker!

Canker blossom!

Sneaker Snack!

[ Laughter ] -Now will not I deliver his letter, for the behavior of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good capacity and breeding.

Therefore this letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the youth.

He'll find it comes from a clodpoll.

I will deliver his challenge by word of mouth.

This shall so fright them both that they will kill one another by the look.

-O, here he comes with your niece!

Give them way till he take leave, and then presently after him!

-I have said too much unto a heart of stone.

Here.

Wear this jewel for me.

'Tis my picture.

O, refuse it not.

It hath no tongue to vex you.

And I beseech you come again tomorrow.

What shall you ask of me that I'll deny that honor saved may upon asking give?

-Nothing but this.

Your true love for my master.

-How with mine honor may I give him that which I have given to you?

-I will acquit you!

-Well, come again tomorrow!

Hah!

Fare thee well!

[ Giggles ] A fiend like thee might bear my soul to hell.

-God save you, gentle man.

-And you, sir.

-That defense thou hast, betake thee to 't.

Of what nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know not, but thy assailant is quick, skillful, and deadly.

-You do mistake, sir.

I am sure no man hath any quarrel to me.

-You'll find it otherwise, I assure you.

Therefore, if you hold your life at any price, betake you to your guard.

-I pray you, sir, what is he?

-He is knight dubbed with unhatched rapier but a devil in private brawl.

Souls and bodies, hath he divorced three.

-I will return again into the house and desire some conduct of the lady!

I am no fighter!

-Sir, no.

Back you shall not to the house.

Therefore on, for meddle you must, that's certain.

-I beseech you, do me this courteous office, as to know of the knight what my offense to him is.

It is something of my negligence, nothing of my purpose.

-I will do so.

Signior Fabian, stay you by this gentleman till my return.

-Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter?

-I know that the knight is incensed against you even to a mortal arbitrament, but nothing of the circumstance more.

-I beseech you, what manner of man is he?

-He is indeed, sir, the most skillful, bloody, and fatal opposite you could possibly have found in all of Illyria.

Will you walk towards him?

-Unh-unh!

-I will make your peace with him, if I can.

-I shall be much bound to you for it!

I am one that had rather go with Sir Priest than Sir Knight.

I care not who knows so much of my mettle!

Aah!

-Aah!

Aah!

Pox on 't!

I'll not meddle with him!

-Well, he'll not now be pacified.

Fabian can scarce hold him yonder.

-Plague on it!

And I thought he had been valiant, I'd have seen him damned 'ere I'd have challenged him.

[ Sobbing ] Let him the matter slip, and I'll give him my horse!

-I'll make the motion.

-[ Whistle blows ] Stand here a while, make a good show on it.

This shall end without the perdition of souls.

Sir, there's no remedy.

He'll fight with you for his oath sake.

Therefore, draw in supportance of his vow.

He protests he will not hurt you.

-Pray God defend me!

A little thing would make me tell them how much I lack of a man!

-Give ground if you see him furious.

-Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy.

-[ Sobbing ] [ Sobbing ] -Come on, sir, to it!

-Uh... -[ All groan ] Ohh!

-I Pray God he keep his oath!

-I do assure you 'tis against my will.

[ Cheers and applause ] [ Bell dings ] -Fight!

– All: Hunh!

Hunh!

[ Both scream ] -Ohh!

-Cesario!

-Aah!

-Put up your weapon!

If this young gentleman have done offense, I take the fault on me!

If you offend him, I for him defy you.

-You, sir?

Why, what are you?

-One, sir, that for his love dares yet do more than you have heard him brag to you he will.

-Nay.

I am for you.

-Good sir Toby, hold!

Here come the officers!

-I'll be with you anon!

-Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit of Count Orsino!

-You do mistake me, sir.

-No, sir, no jot.

I know your favor well, though now you have no sea-cap on your head.

-I must obey.

This comes with seeking you.

-Come, sir, away.

-I must entreat of you some of that money.

-What money, sir?

For the fair kindness you have showed me here, I'll lend you something.

My having is not much.

I'll make division of my present with you.

Hold.

There's half my coffer.

-Will you deny me now?

-Come, sir, I pray you go.

-Let me speak a little!

This youth that you see here I snatched one half out of the jaws of death, relieved him with such sanctity of love, and to his image, which methought did promise most venerable worth, did I devotion!

But O!

How vile an idol proves this god!

Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature shame!

Virtue is beauty, but the beauteous evil are empty trunks o'erflourished by the devil!

-The man grows mad!

Away with him!

-Lead me on!

-Methinks his words do from such passion fly that he believes himself.

So do not I. Prove true, imagination, O prove true, that I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you!

He named Sebastian, I my brother know.

For him I imitate!

Oh!

If it prove, tempests are kind, and salt waves fresh in love!

[ Whistle blows ] -A very paltry, dishonest boy, and more a coward than a hare.

His dishonesty appears in leaving his friend here in necessity and denying him.

-Nay!

I'll after him again!

[ Inhales deeply ] And beat him!

-Do, cuff him soundly, but never draw.

-And I do not!

-Come, let's see the event.

-I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet.

-Will you make me believe that I am not sent for you?

-You go to, thou art a foolish fellow.

Let me be clear of thee.

-Well held out, i' faith!

No, I do not know you, nor I am not sent to you by my lady to bid you come speak with her, nor your name is not Master Cesario, nor this is not my nose neither.

[ Inhales sharply ] Nothing that is so is so.

-I prithee, vent thy folly somewhere else.

Thou know'st not me.

-Vent my folly?

I prithee now, ungird thy strangeness and tell me what I shall vent to my lady.

Shall I vent to her that thou art coming?

-I prithee!

Depart from me!

There's money for thee.

If you tarry longer, I shall give worse payment.

-By my troth thou hast an open hand.

These wise men that give fools money get themselves a good report.

-Ohh!

-Ho-ho-ho!

-Ohh!

-Ohh!

All: Ohh!

-Ohh!

-Ah-ah-ah-ah.

-Ohh!

-Ohh!

-Ah-ah-ah-ah.

-Now, sir... have I met you again!

There's... -[ Chuckles ] -...for you!

-Why, there's for thee!

-Ohh!

-And there and there!

Are all the people mad?!

-Hold, sir!

-This will I tell my lady straight.

-Come on, sir, hold!

-Nay, let him alone!

I'll go another way to work with him!

I'll have an action of battery against him, if there be any law in Illyria!

Though I struck him first, yet there's no matter for that.

-Gah!

Let go thy hand!

-Sir, hold.

I will not let you go.

You are well fleshed.

-I will be free from thee.

-What wouldst thou now?

-Aah!

-What, what?

-Nay, I must have an ounce or two of this malapert blood from you.

-Hold, Toby!

On thy life I charge thee, hold!

-But Madam!

-Will it be ever thus?

Ungracious wretch!

Out of my sight!

Be not offended, dear Cesario.

Rudesby, begone!

I prithee, gentle friend.

Let thy fair wisdom, not thy passion, sway in this uncivil and unjust extent against thy peace.

Go with me to my house and hear thou there how many fruitless pranks this ruffian hath botched up, that thou thereby mayst smile at this.

Thou shalt not choose but go.

Do not deny.

Beshrew his soul for me.

He started one poor heart of mine in thee.

-[ Speaks Swahili ] How runs the stream?

Or I am mad, or else this is a dream.

If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep.

-Nay!

Come, I prithee, would thoud'st be ruled by me.

-Madam, I will.

-O say so, and so be!

-Nay, I prithee put on this gown.

And this.

Make him believe thou art Sir Topas the curate.

Do it quickly.

I'll call Sir Toby.

-Well, I'll put it on.

And I will dissemble myself in it, and I would I were the first that ever dissembled in such a gown.

The competitors enter.

-To him, Sir Topas.

-What ho, I say, peace in this prison.

-The knave counterfeits well.

That's a good knave.

-Who calls there?!

-Sir Topas the curate, who comes to visit Malvolio the lunatic.

-Sir Topas!

Good Sir Topas!

Go to my lady!

-Out, hyperbolical fiend!

How vexest thou this man!

Talkest thou nothing but of ladies?

-Well said.

-Sir Topas, never was man so wronged.

Do not think me mad, Sir Topas!

They have laid me here in hideous darkness!

-Fie, thou dishonest Satan!

I call thee by the most modest terms, for I am one of those gentle ones that will use the devil himself with courtesy.

Sayst thou that house is dark?

-As hell, Sir Topas!

-Madman.

Thou errest!

I say there is no darkness but ignorance!

-I say this house is as dark as ignorance, if ignorance be as dark as hell -- and I say never was man so abused!

Do not think me mad, sir Topas!

I am no more mad than you are!

-Ohh.

Fare thee well.

Remain thou still in darkness.

Fare thee well!

-Sir Topas!

Sir Topas!

-My most exquisite Sir Topas!

-Thou mightst have done without the gown.

He sees thee not.

-To him in thine own voice and bring word how thou find'st him.

I would we were well rid of this knavery.

If he may be conveniently delivered, I would he were, for I am now so far in offense with my niece.

Come with me to my chamber.

- Hey, Robin, jolly Robin Tell me how thy lady does -Fool!

- My lady is unkind, perdy Alas, why is she so?

-Fool!

- She loves another -Good Fool!

-Who calls?

Ha?

-Fool, if ever thou wilt deserve well at my hand, help me to a candle and pen, ink and paper.

As I am a gentleman, I will live to be thankful to thee for it.

-Master Malvolio?

-Ay, good fool.

-Alas, sir, how fell you beside your five wits?

-O, fool, never was man so notoriously abused.

They keep me in darkness, send ministers to me, asses, and do all they can to face me out of my wits!

-Advise you what you say.

The minister is here!

-[as Sir Topas] [ Laughs evilly ] Malvolio!

Malvolio!

Thy wits the heavens restore!

Ha ha ha!

Endeavor thyself to sleep and leave thy vain bibble babble.

-Sir Topas!

-Maintain no words with him, good fellow.

-[Normal voice] Who, I, sir?

Not I, sir!

God be with you, good Sir Topas.

[As Sir Topas] Marry.

Amen.

[Normal voice] I will, sir, I will.

-Fool, fool, fool.

Convey what I will set down to my lady.

It shall advantage thee more than ever the bearing of letter did.

-I will help you to it.

But tell me true, are you not mad indeed, or do you but counterfeit?

-Ohh!

I... Believe me!

I tell thee true!

I am not mad!

-I will fetch you light and paper and ink.

-I shall requite it in the highest degree.

Prithee be gone.

- I am gone, sir And anon, sir I'll be with you again In a trice Like to the old vice Your need to Sustain -This is the air.

[ Chuckles ] That is the glorious sun.

This pearl she gave me, I do feel it and see it.

And though 'tis wonder that enwraps me thus, yet 'tis not madness.

[ Speaks Swahili ] I could not find him at the Elephant.

His counsel now might do me golden service, for though my soul disputes well with my sense that this may be some error but no madness.

[ Speaks Swahili ] This flood of fortune so far exceed all instance, all discourse, that I am ready to distrust mine eyes to any other trust but that I am mad.

Unless the lady's mad?

Yet if it were so, she could not sway her house, command her followers.

[ Speaks Swahili ] -Blame not this haste of mine!

If you mean well, go with me and with this holy man into the chantry by.

And there underneath the consecrated roof, plight me the full assurance of your faith, that my most jealous and too doubtful soul may live at peace.

What do you say?

-I'll go with you and, having sworn truth, ever will be true.

Then lead the way!

And heavens so shine that they may fairly note this act of mine.

[ Wagner's "Bridal Chorus" plays on guitar ] [ Hands clapping ] -I know thee well.

How dost thou, my good fellow?

-Truly, sir, the better for my foes and the worse for my friends.

-Thou shalt not be the worse for me.

There's gold.

If you will let your lady know I am here to speak with her, and bring her along with you, it may awake my bounty further.

-I go, sir.

-Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me.

-That face of his I do remember well, yet when I saw it last, it was in the smoke of war.

-What's the matter?

-Orsino, this is that Antonio, he that did the Tiger board when your young nephew Titus lost his leg.

Here in the streets, desperate of shame and state, in private brabble did we apprehend him.

-He did me kindness, sir, drew on my side, but in conclusion put strange speech upon me.

I know not what 'twas but distraction.

-Notable pirate, thou saltwater thief!

What foolish boldness brought thee to their mercies whom thou, in terms so bloody and so dear, hast made thine enemies?

-Orsino, noble sir, be pleased that I shake off these names you give me.

Antonio never yet was thief or pirate, though, I confess, on base and ground enough Orsino's enemy.

A witchcraft drew me hither.

That most ingrateful boy there by your side from the rude sea's enraged and foamy mouth did I redeem.

A wrack past hope he was.

His life I gave him and did thereto add my love, without retention or restraint, all his in dedication.

For his sake did I expose myself - pure for his love - into the danger of this adverse town.

-How can this be?

-When came he to this town?

-Today, my lord.

And for three months before, both day and night did we keep company.

-Here comes the Countess.

But for thee, fellow - Fellow, thy words are madness.

Three months this youth hath tended upon me.

But more of that anon.

Take him aside.

-What would my lord, but that he may not have, wherein Olivia may seem serviceable?

Cesario, you do not keep promise with me.

-Madam... -Gracious Olivia, I -- -What do you say, Cesario?

Good, my lord.

-My lord would speak, my duty hushes me.

-If it be aught to the old tune, my lord, it is as fat and fulsome to mine ear as howling after music.

-Still so cruel?

-Still so constant, lord.

-To what?

Perverseness?!

You uncivil lady!

Since you to nonregardance cast my faith, and that I partly know the instrument that screws me from my true place in your favor, live you the marble-breasted tyrant still!

But this, your minion, whom I know you love, and whom, by heaven I swear, I tender dearly, Him will I tear out of that cruel eye where he sits crowned in his master's spite.

Come, boy, with me!

My thoughts are ripe with mischief.

I'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love to spite a raven's heart within a dove.

-And I, most jocund, apt and willingly to do you rest a thousand deaths would die.

-Where goes Cesario?

-After him I love more than I love these eyes, more than my life, more by all mores than e'er I shall love wife.

If I do feign, you witnesses above punish my life for tainting of my love.

-Ay me, detested!

How am I beguiled!

-Who does beguile you?!

Who does do you wrong?!

-Hast thou forgot thyself?!

Is it so long?

Call forth the holy father.

-Come, away!

-Whither, my lord?

Cesario, husband, stay!

-Husband?!

-Ay.

Husband.

Can he that deny?!

-Her husband, sirrah?

-No, my lord, not I!

-Fear not, Cesario!

Take thy fortunes up, be that thou know'st thou art, and then thou art as great as that thou fear'st.

O, welcome, father.

I charge thee by thy reverence -- Here.

Here, here.

Hoo-hoo.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Here, here.

Here.

To unfold what thou dost know hath newly passed between this youth and me.

Mm-hmm.

-Uh... A contract of eternal bond of love, confirmed by mutual joinder of your hands, sealed in my function, by my testimony!

Since when, my watch hath told me, toward my grave I have traveled but two hours!

-Oh, ho-ho-ho.

Thou dissembling cub.

What wilt thou be when time hath sowed a grizzle on thy case?

Farewell, and take her, but direct thy feet where thou and I henceforth may never meet.

-My lord, I do protest -- -O, do not swear.

Hold little faith, though thou hast too much fear.

-For the love of God, a surgeon!

Send one presently to Sir Toby!

-What's the matter?

-Has broke my head across and has given Sir Toby a bloody coxcomb too!

For the love of God, send help!

-Who has done this, Sir Andrew?

-The Count's "gentle man," one Cesario.

We took him for a coward, but he's the very devil incarnate!

-My gentleman Cesario?

-[ Screaming ] 'Od's lifelings, there he is!

No!

No!

No!

You broke my head for nothing!

-Why do you speak to me?!

I never hurt you!

I bespoke you fair and hurt you not!

-Who hath made this havoc?!

-I am sorry, madam!

I have hurt your kinsman!

But had it been the brother of my blood, I must have done no less with wit and safety.

You throw a strange regard upon me, and by that I do perceive it hath offended you.

Pardon me, sweet one, even for the vows we made each other but so late ago.

-One face, one voice, one habit, and two persons?

-Antonio!

O my dear Antonio.

How the hours racked and tortured me since I have lost thee!

-Sebastian are you?

-Fear'st thou that.

Antonio.

-How have you made division of yourself?

An apple cleft in two is not more twin than these two creatures.

Which is Sebastian?!

-Most wonderful!

[ Audience laughter ] [ Audience cheers and applause ] -Do I stand there?

I never had a brother.

Of charity, what kin are you to me?

[ Speaking Swahili ] -Sebastian... [ Speaking Swahili ] [ Speaking Swahili ] -[ Speaking Swahili ] -[ Speaking Swahili ] -[ Speaking Swahili ] -[ Speaking Swahili ] [ Speaking Swahili ] -[ Speaking Swahili ] -If nothing lets to make us happy both, but these... [ Speaking Swahili ] Do not embrace me till each circumstance of... [ Speaking Swahili ] Do cohere and jump!

That I am Viola!

Ohh!

[ Audience cheers and applause ] Which to confirm I'll bring you to a captain in this town, where lie my maiden weeds, by whose gentle help I was preserved to serve this noble count.

All the occurrence of my fortune since hath been between this lady and this lord.

-So comes it, lady, you have been mistook.

You would have been contracted to a maid.

Nor are you therein, by my life, deceived.

You are betrothed both to a maid and man.

-If this be so... [ Audience laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] As yet the glass seems true, I shall have share in this most happy wrack.

Boy, thou hast said to me a thousand times thou never should love woman like to me.

-And all those sayings will I overswear.

And all those swearings keep as true in soul as doth that orbed continent the fire that severs day from night.

-Now let me see thee in thy woman's weeds.

-The captain that did bring me first on shore hath my maid's garments.

He upon some action is now in durance at Malvolio's suit, a gentleman and follower of my lady's.

-He shall enlarge him.

And yet, alas, now I remember me, they say, poor gentleman, he's much distract.

How does he, sirrah?

-He has here writ a letter to you.

-Open 't and read it.

-[ Chuckles ] Look then to be well edified, when the fool delivers the madman.

[as Malvolio] "By the Lord, madam, you have wronged me!"

-How now!

Art thou mad?

-[Normal voice] No, madam.

I do but read madness.

An your ladyship will have it as it ought to be, you must allow vox.

-Prithee.

-[ Groans ] -Did he write this?

-Ay, madam.

-See him delivered.

Fabian, bring him hither.

My lord, so please you, these things further thought on, to think me as well a sister as a wife.

One day shall crown the alliance on it, so please you, here at my house and at my proper cost.

-Madam, I am most apt to embrace your offer.

Your master quits you -- and for your service done him.

So much against the mettle of your sex, so far beneath your soft and tender breeding.

And since you called me master for so long... ...here is my hand.

You shall from this time be your master's mistress.

-A sister you are she!

[ Women shriek ] [ Men grunt ] [ Laughter ] -Is this the madman?

-Ay, my lord, the same.

Alas, Malvolio?

-Madam, you have done me wrong, Notorious wrong.

-Have I, Malvolio?

No.

-Lady, you have!

Pray you peruse the letter.

You must not now deny that is your hand.

And tell me in the modesty of honor why have you given me such clear lights of favor, bade me come smiling and cross-gartered to you, and I acting this in an obedient hope, why have you suffered me to be imprisoned, kept in a dark house, and made to suffer most notorious geck and gull that e'er invention ever played upon!

Tell me!

Why?!

-Alas, Malvolio!

This is not my writing.

Though I confess much like the character.

But out of question 'tis Maria's hand.

And now I do bethink me, 'twas she first told me thou wast mad.

Prithee be content.

This practice hath most shrewdly passed upon thee, but when we know the grounds and authors of it, thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge of thine own cause.

-Good madam, hear me speak?

And let no quarrel nor no brawl come to taint the condition of this present hour, which I have wondered at.

In hope it shall not.

Most freely I confess Toby and myself set this device against Malvolio here, upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts we had conspired against him.

Maria writ the letter, upon Sir Toby's great importance, in recompense whereof he hath married her.

How with a sportful malice it was followed may rather pluck on laughter than revenge, if the injuries be justly weighed that have on both sides passed.

-Alas, how have they baffled thee.

Ohh.

-Why, some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.

I was one Sir Topas, sir.

But do you remember, madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascal, and you smile not he is...gagged?

And thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges.

-I... will be revenged... on the whole pack of you!

[ Audience applause ] -He has been most notoriously abused.

-Meantime... Sweet sister, we will not depart from hence.

Cesario, come, for so you shall be while you are a man, but when in other habits you are seen, Orsino's mistress.

-And his fancy's queen!

[ Laughter ] - When that I was A little tiny boy A foolish, foolish thing Was but a toy But when I came to man's estate 'Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate Hey, ho, the wind and rain But when I came, alas, to wive By swaggering I could never thrive But when I came unto my beds With tosspots still had drunken heads Hey, ho The wind and rain A great while ago The world begun Hey, ho The wind and the rain But that's all one, our play is done We'll strive to please you every day Hey, ho, the wind and rain - Hey, ho, the wind and rain - The wind and the rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain - For the rain and rain o'er every day - The wind and rain - Hoo-ooh - Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] - Wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain -Sing it!

- Hey, ho, the wind and rain -Sing it.

- Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain Hey, ho, the wind and rain - Rain, rain, rain, rain - Hey, ho, the wind and rain - Rain, rain, rain, rain - Hey, ho, the wind and rain - Hey, ho, the wind and rain -To find out more about this and other "Great Performances" programs, visit PBS.org/greatperformances and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.

- Hey, ho, the wind and rain - Ohh, rain We love you, Illyria!

[ Cheers and applause ]