Black Nouveau

Good evening, I'm Joanne Williams. Welcome to beyond the virus and the protests. This is the "Black Nouveau" special. As the coronavirus has changed the world in which we all live, so have the protests and the demands for justice sparked by the murder of George Floyd. Changes can be very scary and very stressful and that's why we're here tonight. Talking about mental health is sometimes considered taboo in the African American community. Well, we have four therapists with us tonight who will show why that tool is needed to maintain our sanity and our tranquility. During the next hour, we're going to hear from them about ways to cope with today's challenges and uncertainties. You'll also get a chance to pose some of your questions and get some of your answers right here. So please type your questions in the chat box. Joining me is a panel moderator, Dr. Kweku Ramel Smith. Dr. Smith. - Hi, nice to be here, okay. There you are, how are you tonight? I'm doing great and ready and excited about this program. I'm just very excited that "Black Nouveau" has this platform for us to be able to share a little bit of knowledge with the people. Well, let's start with this question and we've talked about this before. What is mental health? And what is good mental health? Yeah, that's a great question. So whenever we talk about mental health, we have to be very careful about how we explain it because most people equate mental health with mental illness and that's why we don't wanna talk about mental health 'cause we say, there's nothing wrong with me or I'm not crazy. I don't need to see anybody. There's nothing wrong with me. We just enumerate that point. But when we talk about mental health as a spectrum, on one end is illness and those are the things that sometimes we have to deal with those psychosis issues, but on the other end of that spectrum, is what we call wellness and that's the things that makes us well, that makes us great. So it's about being preventative in our mental health to make sure everything is great. So when we talk about mental health, we wanna make sure we look at that spectrum from illness to wellness, but make sure we're doing more things on the front end. What would you like our panel tonight to come out with? What sort of goals do you have for tonight's discussion? You know what, here's a few things we want as the panelists. We've talked about it, we've discussed it and what we wanna do is to be able to bring a conversation that's been talked about, but talk about it in a different way where people come out, refresh and renew, understanding that mental health having a provider is actually something great, but being able to look at it within the frame, specifically within that African diaspora where you say, "How can we talk about this where it relates to me?" Let me ask you one more question. Do you know sometimes that you are having a problem with mental health, or does it come as a surprise sometimes? It's a combination. Sometimes other people who are close in your life can maybe see it, but then sometimes we're very good at wearing masks in this world, and so those are the times where we know that we're doing something we're not supposed to, feeling things we're not supposed to. The question is, can we have the courage and the fortitude to go out and seek that help? And can we have people who can truly help us in a way that will help us move the needle? Well, I want everybody watching tonight to remember that this is a conversation among informed friends. It doesn't infer a therapeutical relationship with these experts, but if the words resonate with you and may feel that you might need some help, please seek a culturally competent professional and they will be able to help you. Now we're going to hear a little introduction from each of our panelists and then we'll talk a little bit more with Dr. Smith. After that, we're going to move to a general discussion and we'll also include some of your questions. Now, let's meet our first panelist, Arnitta Holliman, a licensed professional counselor. I'm Arnitta Holliman, a licensed professional counselor. From COVID-19 to police brutality, we are seeing Black men, women and children dying at disproportionate rates at the hands of a system that is built on racism and White supremacy. Be it from disparate negative health outcomes to public execution in the street. Our nation is in crisis and this crisis is hundreds of years in the making. We are seeing civil unrest, not only locally but nationally and globally, and community members and community leaders are on the frontlines fighting these injustices. They're organizing, protesting, making demands and making every attempt that they can to help others heal, but how do they heal in the middle of this crisis while they too may be experiencing the same experiences and enduring pain from systemic violence, racism, structural violence and systematic injustice. We're going to talk about some of these things. A little reminder, we will be taking your questions later on after we hear the conversation from all of our panelists. Now, Dr. Smith, what are your thoughts along with Arnitta? You know what, I mean, she said it right off the bat. She talked about wWite supremacy and racism. You weren't afraid to talk about that elephant in the room sometimes. So the first question I pose to Arnitta is when we, excuse me, when we look at it, we always talk about these things that are blind and these things that are blamed when we look at overt and covert racism. I want you to talk about those ways that we see the covert and overt racism affect our mental health today. So covert and overt racism both have an impact on our mental health and our well-being and the trauma, racial trauma is where we see or experience psychological symptoms that are connected to racism and discrimination, and so we may see some of the same kinds of symptoms related to like depression or anxiety, depending on the experience PTSD. So we're gonna see some of the same manifestations as a result of racism, whether it be covert or overt, and also there's research that talks about our mental health and well-being, how it's impacted, just from having the hyper-vigilance around being concerned that you're going to be discriminated against. So when we look at that, we look at our melanated skin and we wonder why does it create this fear and this ferocity between authority figures? Can you tell us why? Well, so authority figures, to say more when you say authority figures, which authority-- We're talking about, like specifically with police brutality, those who have the ability to put some type of control over us. Yeah, so one, we have to think about how are these systems built? Every system in America, every institution in America was built on a foundation of racism and White supremacy and when we think about policing in America, it was born out of the slave patrols and so it's original intention was to oppress, and so we have to grapple with the fact that we are still seeing some of those oppressive tactics being used now and obviously not in every police department, not with every police person, however it is happening, and so if we coupled that with long held stereotypes and misunderstandings and racist ideologies and policies that have a racist foundation and you put all that together, that's a perfect storm for continuing to oppress communities of color. And so when I look at this, I know you're on the ground, fields and everything like that. So how do you see the mental health we're at here not only on those who experienced this trauma, but also the organizers from the grassroot levels to those who are actually deluging the community that's trying to stop it? So am absolutely seeing and hearing from folks who are in the community doing amazing work and whether that's leading protests or that's organizing cleanups, or that's organizations that they work with that are doing the work, or that's other therapists and they are feeling the pain of this and we cannot separate our blackness and our experiences as Black people from the work that we do, and so the hard part is we're trying to help our people be liberated, we're trying to help people heal and at the same time try to work through that and heal for ourselves. The difficulty is in healing from something that is still going on, and so we talked about post-traumatic stress disorder that's because the trauma has stopped, but we are experiencing a trauma that has not stopped for hundreds of years for Black people in this community, and so we have to figure out ways that we can work on ourselves and stay well and also connect with others and that community healing is extremely important because we are tribal people. So talk about that real quickly. When we talk about this compound trauma and things we have to do to keep saying in the midst of it, what are a few tips that you can give people to just keep their sanity in the moment of it? So definitely taking the time to breathe. Sometimes we underestimate the value in breath until we don't have it or until we're marching in the streets because it was taken from someone, and so we should take that moment as many times as we need to just stop and have a deep breath. Definitely meditation, prayer if you have a particular spiritual or religious practice, faith practice, you want to do that. Connecting with close others, doing things that you find joy, that brings you joy and if you're starting to feel like depressive symptoms or something, you may not want to do those things but it's important to push yourself to do them because you will reap the benefits from it. Thank you, sister Arnitta. See Joanne, I told you they're here for something special. I could keep this interview going. I know we gotta get to our next panelist but I hope the people are enjoying what you're hearing 'cause she gives some great information off the bat. Well Alfonzo Watkins is waiting in the wings now. He's a clinical psychologist and let's have a little introduction to him. First thing we must always do is give honor and praise to our Creator, for creating us out of his image and in her likeness and given us the breath of life and opportunity to live another day. Exactly, I must give honor and praise to our ancestors, male and female who sacrifice blood, sweat and tears, so we may enjoy some of the freedoms that we have here in this stolen land. Once again, I am truly honored to be part of this panel and have a discussion on racism and the impact that it is having on the circumstances that we are facing now. My name is Alfonzo Watkins, I'm a licensed clinical psychotherapist here in Milwaukee. I have over 25 years of experience working in Milwaukee County, in the lens that I'm going to be speaking from is out of a Black African developmental psychology perspective, and basically what that means is that I'm going to be attempting to help individuals understand how we as the ascendants of kidnapped and enslaved Africans have evolved under the conditions of racism and oppression in this country, and from a historical perspective bring it to the present to help individuals once again to understand the impact of internalized racism and how our trauma is a continuous historical trauma. So once again, I am truly honored to be part of this panel and look forward to sharing this information with the community. More love and safe travels. Kweku, he talked about the historical perspective. Will the two of you talk a little more about that, please? Yeah, you know what, when I heard this I was just so excited because often times in class we hear about Manifest Destiny, but we don't hear about colonization and imperialism within American context and what I want brother Alfonzo to talk about what has this land, this indoctrination from this colonized state done to the African mind and consciousness? What has happened to those of us who have had to live under these conditions it has created a human being that is taking us out of our original state of being, and what that means is we are practicing a eurocentric perspective or eurocentric cultural foundation once again, but we're Africans. So in that concept we are in a continuous state it's called dual consciousness, where we are functioning or attempting to function as Africans, but we're being forced to function as Europeans and that creates once again a bipolar disorder. So bipolar circumstances where we're constantly trying to navigate through two cultures. So as we began to have this conversation from a historical perspective is understanding that when we are being socialized, the socialization is a European social construct. See, I love how you talk about that and I've heard you speak before and I hear you talk about things like linguistic amnesia and you talk about how do we awaken that hidden cellular DNA from our African roots that has been suppressed by the socialization here? How do we awaken that DNA? I think is critical that the higher learning institutions and the school systems understand that it's important that those of us who are the descendants of kidnapped and enslaved Africans we can't continue to be to be judged and engaged by comparing us to Europeans, or comparing us to any other ethnic group 'cause we're the only one that have experienced what we have experienced. So our children and even those of us who are adults have to understand we need an African-centered perspective, an African-centered curriculum, an African-centered reality once again to improve our perspective of ourselves, to have a positive self-worth, have a positive self-image, have a positive self-identity. Only comes out of an African-centered paradigm. Now, once again, that does not mean that we are attempting to go back to Africa, but what that does means is that we have or need to be able to be self-determined, being able to define ourselves under the circumstances that we living on. So when we start talking about systemic and structural and institutional racism, when it comes to the higher learning component we definitely have to look at the way the history has been shown. It continues to denigrate the contributions of what Africans have done on not only in America, but on the planet. So when you look at like books like "The Falsification of Afrikan Consciousness" by Amos Wilson or "The Mis-Education of the Negro" by Carter G. Woodson, I think it stems into what we talk about this internalized racism coined by the sociologist like Karen Pyke, where she talks about we internalize this oppression of racial subordination as a conscious and unconscious support of a social hierarchy. How do we really dig deep into understanding that what we are is beautiful. James Brown said, "I'm black, and I'm proud." How do we get back into that revolution of self-love? Once again, it goes back to the concept of us being able to take control of the narrative of our experience here in America. Us being able to define what it means or what it is to attempt to function in racism. I think our European family is gonna have to become more aware and become more respectful of those of us who are experts in the field so that we can be begin to take control of the conversation, where we define what our experience has been under racism. So since Wisconsin has identified racism as a health crisis, I think it once again, we need to define what that crisis is and when you brought up the falsification of our consciousness, Dr. Amos Wilson was articulating that what has happened is Europeans have created the environmental social conditions that we live under then they come in and diagnose it, then come up with the treatment and we can't continue to function like that moving into the 21st Century. We have to be able to define and articulate what our species is and the Europeans are gonna have to respect that and move that into the structures of these institutions. So I'm gonna ask one last question as we wrap up on this panel. We talk about this internalized racism what we have to do, for a person who's hearing this for the first time, who's been trained to believe that something is wrong with African and an African mindset, what is the first thing you would introduce them to begin the healing process? The healing process starts with once again and I think this is not just for African Americans, I think this is for everybody on the planet. The image of us has once again been destroyed and have many of us also have bought into that we are inferior, and so we have to get to a place once again, where the truth is being told about the reality of who we are and what we were doing prior to us being kidnapped and stolen from Africa. We were not swinging for trees. We were not running around half naked. We had civilizations, we had family structure, we had a society where there was a structure for stages of development. So once again, the image that has been portrayed of us is the truth is gonna have to be told, and the beauty of who we are, we have still been able to produce positive and productive human beings under these dehumanizing conditions. Loyalty and loyalty inside our DNA. I love it brother. We got one more sister Joanne, queen mother. Let's go to our last panelist before we really get it rolling. Yes, well, let's let's hear a little bit from Simmone Kilgore, who is a licensed professional counselor. She's with us too. -

Kweku

Hey, you know what, this is one of my favorites. I'm Simmone Kilgore, licensed professional counselor, as well as a licensed cosmetologist, We're gonna be talking about our resilience, the history of African Americans and how we got to this country, our contributions to this country and the communities in which we live and serve, and how as a community, we build stronger relationships and stronger connection with each other, in order to move forward and beyond. Some of the things that we have experienced as a people. I wanna share a lot of information with you about our community hub, in terms of our churches, our salons, our community, businesses, coffee shops, playgrounds, where we get together and talk a lot about Black resilience. How it is that we made it over, how we've made it through and how we can continue to stick together and build on that resilience like our ancestors and move forward in life in a way that is beneficial and helpful for us all. Please join us in the conversation, share your information and your questions and any opinions you may have about our resilience and how we've made it through, yet we still rise, thank you. And we will be taking some of your questions in just a few minutes. First of all, Dr. Smith, what would you and Simmone Kilgore like to emphasize? Well, you know what I think she stated it from the get go about these great hubs that we have. Sometimes we forget because we haven't sought out mental health places. We've always had an effect on mental health place and we've had our churches, we've had our community clubs, but we've also had our barbers and our salons. This is why I'm so excited about Simmone because she's been a double psychologist because she told you that she does hair and she works on the mind. So I wanna ask you this first question Simmone. When you talk about when you ended yet we still rise, tell me where that came from. Yeah, I think even at the time I said it it was just something that's in the underbelly. Something that floats around between us as people, as people who are descendants from Africa. We have a story, a history of rising out of the ashes or for lack of a better term, being that Phoenix, being that sun that rises on the next day after we've gone through something tumultuous and I don't know if anybody can identify the way that we have with historical trauma, in the way that we have and still stand up and look the way we do, and walk the way we walk, and motivate the way we motivate, and cultivate the way we cultivate. I don't know of another people who have done it quite the same way with the same type of style and grace that makes our European brothers and sisters love our culture. Adopt, steal and utilize our culture, and so yes, we rise and we will continue to rise because we are attractive in that way. Our resilience is attractive. And that's where I want to go to next because when we talk about that resilience, we've overcome a lot, a lot of things we should not have had to overcome. So tell me what it is about the beauty and the gift of resiliency inside of our people and that burden that we have to carry with it. It is such a burden, it is a burden, and it is a burden that feels me and feels all of us in a way that is so heavy, sometimes unrecognizable. I think Dr. Alfonzo spoke about those of us that are not aware, that walk around without this true identity of knowing who we are. Yes, I may not know everything about my history and my ancestors, but inside of me I know that I have this resilience because I've tried to fight it. I've tried to say, "Oh, I'm tired of fighting. "I'm tired of trying to fit in and figure out, "fight for my voice to be heard." You get tired of it but at the same time while we change carry that burden there's a beauty in having that experience that I want us all to be soaked in. Not just the burden of it, but the beauty of being able to wake up after something and figure out how to deal with it and call on friends and loved ones and other people, my people and say, "Wow, I made it through, "and now I wanna help you make it through." And then continue on that way. Yeah, we get tired of carrying the load but I don't really know what other choice we have. And you know I love when you talk about we get tired of carrying the load. I think one of the beauties is that community that we had and that goes back to those hubs. Tell me why these hubs are so special, and how they're even more special today than maybe in times in the past. Yeah, and I like how you framed even more important today. I think they're important today because I think people don't recognize them as much and that could be my view of it but I know growing up going to the salon with my mama, understanding what it felt like when women left the salon. It was more about the inner change, that inner transformation that I saw when a woman walked in the salon. and walked out and what that did for her. On the outside, yeah, it was a beautiful transformation, whether it be hair, makeup or whatever, but at the same time knowing that you have support in those hubs, where you can whisper in somebody's ear, you can cry, you can laugh, you can joke, you can talk about your own family and they know you love them and you're going home to be with them, but at the same time it meant somebody else on the planet gets what I'm saying, supports me and this is a safe place to share and just be me. We all need a safe place to just be me. So our salons, our barber shops, our churches, our basement parties, I don't know the basketball court where we sat on a stool and talked and chopped it up after work, wherever that place is for you. We find it funny where we are more like ourselves and who doesn't authentically wanna be. I heard my sister Arnitta speak about congruence. I want to be in line with my spirit, the spirit of my ancestors and who I am now and where I'm going, I don't wanna have to try to fit in these hodgepodges all over. It's too disconforming and it's too confusing for a person to carry. I wanna take you out on this question right here because we talked about these hubs, these communities, these families outside of our families, but everybody will say it starts at home. I want you to give us some of those wisdom and jewels that you learned from your mama, your mama's mama, or your mama's mama's mama that was past that. I know one of the things I'll never forget. My mother would always talk about faith, focus and follow through and I know I shared a lot but her faith, our faith, the faith that we have as a people carried us. The faith where an enslaved woman had to give up her son, she had to pick which one to give up, and she believed and had a faith that he's gonna be alright and I'll see him again. I don't know faith stronger than that. It gives chills now talking about it. It's all about faith and focus. What is your focus? What are your goals? What do you want? And what do you want for your people? And then the follow through is the legwork. Put your feet down, put your legs down like Arnitta and Dr. Alfonzo spoke what do you wanna do in the community? Whether it's pray for somebody, feed somebody, march, organize, I don't know what it is, but the follow through is so important and all three of those things go hand in hand. So for me growing up, I knew keep my head up. I can be heard and seen, and it's okay to be who you are. Queen Joanne, you know what I'm full already. So I can't wait to get to this next round. This is really exciting for me to be able to listen to other professionals, 'cause sometimes people say, "Well, what do you do as a licensed professional?" And this is what I do, when I hear them talk this builds me up in a different type of manner. So I'm excited and I want you to continue with this next round of questions as we go into it. Okay, well, let me start with Arnitta. Let me ask you a question. A lot of people need mental health services right now. Are there social agencies that can assist them in this time? Absolutely, so a lot of therapists are seeing their caseloads increased significantly as a result of both COVID-19 and the protests and civil unrest that we're seeing. There are definitely places that they can go. The County Behavioral Health System has numbers that you can call there. There's actually a website that lists some Black therapists both in Wisconsin and Milwaukee. I mean, in Milwaukee and Minnesota, I'm sorry. It's the Mary Ellen Strong Foundation. There is a collective of Black therapists here in Milwaukee. So there are a number of places that people can go. If they have insurance they can look on their insurance, the back of their insurance card and you can always ask someone and so there are a lot of places that people can go, I want people to know that it's okay to start wherever you are. It's okay that you didn't start before, but you can start now seeing a therapist and if you find a therapist and you're not really feeling like that's the best fit for you, it's okay to find someone else, don't stop there, and so sometimes we have a tendency or folks will have a tendency to not continue therapy if they didn't feel like they jailed with that first person but keep going, there's the right clinician out there for you. Let me let me pose a question to Simmone. You're in the community dealing with trauma and sometimes every day, I heard something the other day about the whole pandemic that we're dealing with. This person said "We're all in a huge storm, "but we're all in separate boats." How can we get help in our individual boat? Sure, so again to repeat what Arnitta said, there's a gambit of professional help out here and we do recommend professional help. So the community hubs are beautiful, where you can be you and you can talk but what we've been doing through programming is to try to educate people even in salons of where to send people because we are all in different boats. Some of us are suffering from PTSD or depression. Some of us just needs support for a little while. Some of us need long-term health and so there's such a huge connection with all of us going through this pandemic but everybody, especially when you talk about the differing of ethnicities and racism, socio economic backgrounds, everybody has a different boat that they're in. So I might not have a speedboat or I might have a yacht, I might be paddling, but there's some help for you as well. That's good to know. Alfonzo you talk about mental health from a culturally conscious perspective. Is there a difference in dealing with the trauma associated with African Americans than in others? And who should we be looking for to help us deal with it? I think it's important that, once again I'm gonna go back to the higher learning institutions. I think they are doing many of us a disservice by not acknowledging the scholarly work that other ethnic groups have put forth. So in the context of that, I think our European family needs to be exposed to African scholars who have done empirical research and have done the necessary, I'm gonna say research to show that we as the descendants of kidnapped and enslaved Africans need a different form of a theoretical, I'm gonna say theoretical modality to deal with our circumstances. I'm just gonna name a few that I know many people just don't know about. I mean, so there's Amos Wilson, Dr. Amos Wilson, Dr. Marimba Ani, Dr. Frances Cress Welsing, Dr. Wade Nobles, Dr. Na'im Akbar, Dr. Bobby Wright just to name a few that I think we'll help individuals begin to understand the paradigm that is going to be needed to help us as we transition through this construct of dealing with internalized racism to improve our self-image, our self-worth and our self-identity. So I think that's gonna be critical as we move forward with helping individuals of every ethnic group come out of this pandemic. Well, let's continue this discussion. I have a lot of questions that I'd like to ask and I'm sure you have questions that you wanna ask each other. Let's go back to Dr. Smith and see what he can start us off with, Kweku? Well, you know what, when we think about this right here, we talked about just the title. How do we get past the pandemic? How do we get past structural racism? How do we just deal with day to day traumas on dealing on top of that? So what I like to pose each of the panelists is just thinking about this, what are some of the issues going on specifically with COVID-19 that people need to know that they can be able to work through this difficult time? We'll start with Alfonzo I think as it relates to the pandemic, the pandemic and finally I'm gonna speak from, I'ma say a collective experience. I think a lot of times we wanna individualize some of this conversation and I'll let the two queens if they go individually but I'm gonna talk from a collective perspective. The pandemic has exposed the disparities in the Black community that we are dealing with as a collective group of people. So I think it's critical that we understand the reality of we need the institutions to put some things in place to get more brothers and sisters to become attorneys, doctors, physicians, I'ma say psychologists and psychiatrists, because what's happening in our community, we don't have enough professionals to provide the services that our community needs. So just like with the opioid pandemic, when the opioid pandemic was acknowledged as a health crisis, legislation, laws and policies were changed to address that pandemic. So the crisis that is going on in the Black community is the same. So we need legislation and policies changed as with how institutions have created these discriminatory practices that keep us out of these spaces. We need for that to be addressed for more African American, more Latinos and more indigenous brothers associates can get these credentials so that we can provide services to our people. Arnitta, do you wanna follow up on that, as far as COVID-19? Again, what's another area that has affected our community specifically? Absolutely, I wholeheartedly agree with everything that Alfonzo said, and we have to be mindful of the fact that COVID-19 disproportionately impacted the Black community. It has since the beginning and continues to and there are a number of reasons for that, right? And so when we look at our healthcare system, we look at just some of the structural and systemic issues that lead to poor health outcomes for Black folk that's a part of this underlying piece of, so why are so many Black people testing positive? Why are they dying at a higher rate? If we look at laws, Alfonzo said laws and policies, all of those things around redlining and who lives where and how close people live together, and in a number of different things, and what kind of treatment we get when we go in for care. So we know that there are studies and there's plenty of information to show us that Black folk, when they go into the health care system often are not believed or not taken seriously, do not get the additional care that they need, and so if we know that we wanna work from every front. On the front around policy and programs and pushing and changing things, we absolutely need to work there but individually, we need to remember that we have to keep ourselves healthy, whether that's eating right, reducing the stress and when it first came out around the symptoms for COVID-19 and there was this picture of like who was at risk or most at risk initially, and it was folks with underlying conditions. So of course, people that are a little senior and then people with underlying conditions, and the reality is if you are a Black living in America you have an underlying condition, because when we think about racism and White supremacy and the chronic stress that it produces, stress is going to do a whole lot in your body and it's gonna affect a lot of your functioning. So whether that's high blood pressure, and leading to heart disease, stroke, any of those things, you have an underlying condition, and so what do we need to do to take care of ourselves that we are prepared before any of these things hit and when they do hit if we're not prepared, we mobilize to take care of ourselves, as well as physical body, our mental well-being all of that while we continue to fight for change. Simmone, I want you to talk about COVID-19 and what it did to us from an economic standpoint. We know the income inequality talked about not having those hubs that are those small businesses that needed and what it did for us not to have those places to go to that brought us comfort. Sure, it was alarming for a lot of folks in the sense that they could not connect and could not get together in the way that normally feels good. To be face-to-face with somebody you know loves you, right? And cares about you and you can get wise information, and so having to find new ways to figure out how to connect is hard, but economically for Black and Brown folks to stay home from work in order not to spread the disease or not be connected was very difficult, and so a lot of Black and Brown people contracted or we're in contact with folks who have symptoms or not 'cause we're learning so much more about COVID, right? Because they had to continue to go to work to feed their children, to pay their bills. There's not enough sustainable income set up aside so that we can be home for two or three months out of the year ever, and still make bills and still be okay. And so economically, we suffered because we couldn't go out to work and then we suffered socially and spiritually and mentally because we didn't have those hubs to go to at that time, and so then there's the increasing cost that everybody is kind of talking about, sure. When we think about this pandemic, we say, "Wow, what could be worse?" But then we already knew about racism being a public health issue, but then when George Floyd cried mama, I think that put everybody in the world on alert, and Simmone I wanna come right back to you right there. When you heard George Floyd cry out to his mama, this big six six strong man call out for his mama, while being brutally murdered in front of millions of people not at the time, but afterwards, what went into your heart as far as not only for him, but for Black mothers across the world and the fears they have every day and that manifesting it? It's so interesting that you said that and I think sitting here in this moment I'm reflecting on watching the video which everybody watching at the time or did not. But I remember when I heard him and saw him face to the ground, pressure on his neck, saying, "Mama", and for some reason, I knew in that moment that she wasn't still here on the earth. I too, have lost my mother and I don't know why that connected with me so much, but it connected with a lot of us, but for some reason I knew that he was calling out to her spirit and so that's one of the things that Dr. Watkins touched on and Arnitta touched on that we are a spiritual connected people, and so in order to better understand us you have to understand that part about us, and so at that moment when I heard it, not only did I cry for him but all the other people that we do not know, For those of us that jumped off the slave ships in order not to go to a foreign place that probably called out mama too, that probably said, "I don't understand what I've done wrong. "All I wanna do is live and be free." But somebody is against that. So in that moment, I was angry and I was defeated and hurt and did not understand why nothing was happening to free him in that moment. How many times in our history has that happened? We can't count. So just to say I connected with other women, of course, I cried, I talked to my son and the man that I love, and at that point, a mama, a woman, a dad, all of us just wanna hold our loved ones to protect them. Nobody wants to ever know about that happening ever again, which is why the unrest is happening, never again. And so you talk about that unrest and Arnitta what I want you to do is explain what was it that not only summoned Black people but it seemed to summon people who normally don't gather in this. You have people saying all lives matter and all of a sudden they can articulate that Black lives matter. What was it about that call from George that got a lot more people interested, not just from a local or national level, but even as a global phenomenon? I think a part of it goes back to your question to Simmone about him calling out for his mother. I saw people protesting, carrying signs that said when George Floyd call for his mother, he summoned all mothers and that didn't have anything to do with race. That was something that I'm sure that it made something rise up in other mothers, even of other races, of other tongues, of other nations to say if that was my baby, and hearing those voices, hearing that sound and I think about me even watching him on that ground calling for his mother, honestly you got to be a different level of a human to not feel anything, and so then those are the things that we think are abnormal that you feel nothing around that and so as a human race, people were stepping up and standing up and talking about the injustice there because I think people felt that on a human level and then of course, mothers felt it on that level, and then as a people we're sick and tired of dying in the street. We are sick and tired of seeing our men, women, children, loved ones being taken at the hands of oppressive systems by police who have a motive that is not beneficial to that person or us as a people, we're tired, and so people got out in the streets and I think the other piece of that is that the protests and the civil unrest has not died down and so the fact that people are standing on, I feel this, this is real, we are not gonna let this die and let it rest and I think some people were waiting on it to die down, but when it didn't, I think there are other people that started to rise up like, okay, this is a thing, this is serious. You know what, and I'm glad you do that 'cause it helps me transition to brother Alfonzo. I want to thank you in advance for the service that you pay to this country, brother. -

Woman

Yes. You've done so many great things for this country, unlike so many brothers who have served to say to come back to a country who doesn't always appreciate you. Now America has a strong defense system and we pride ourselves on how strong our defense system is. In fact, America was built upon violence. So why is America so surprised that some of these peaceful riots, peaceful protests turn into uprisings and the violence comes out of it? Can you explain that to the people? I don't know if America is necessarily surprised. I think they are aware and when I say they, there's an element of a European family that is very hateful and just don't respect the humanism and other people. So we had this conversation, we're not talking about all Europeans, we're talking about that there's an element amongst them but from a historical perspective, America has continued to exploit and extort, take away from the masses of people and I think the masses of people are fed up with just the straight out disrespect for human life. Straight out disrespect for the working man and woman. People are just fed up. So I think America, this is a crossroad for the leadership in America to recognize that there has to be some decisions, some executive decisions made as how are we going to move forward in this country and make sure that everybody get their basic needs met, that everybody is able to, when I go into Walgreens, it's $3 for some deodorant. I mean, bread is two or $3 and people wages have not went up. So there's a level of frustration with the structure of racism and is showing across the board with how people are viewing this situation with watching that grown big, Black man be done like that, and in him not being able to defend or protect himself as a Black male, I mean, it just tore me apart to see that and not be able to help that brother. So once again depending on where you at in your humanism, the challenge is now how are we gonna move forward? Dr. Smith let me jump in here and ask a question. We're getting a lot of questions from the people who are watching. So I wanna pose one of them to you and I think you can all give us an answer to this. What are some of the tips for grieving while in social isolation? How can people handle the grief process which may be associated with family members or others, or just grieving because they feel bad? What can they do? You know what, and this is a beautiful question because a lot of people were grieving before the pandemic and before this social injustice, and so what we've learned is from this pandemic a lot of the things that we were doing wasn't necessarily healthy but the pandemic has forced us to look at some of the things that we took for granted that we didn't have. Before I left the house, my daughter made me this little thing right here and what it was, is we got a chance to sit down last night and just to do some little arts and crafts, so stuff I'd never have time to get to do, and you say what can we do for the grieving, hold those people who are there just a little bit closer. Appreciate these moments, appreciate these times and even for the people who are going to assist Simmone talked about her dear mother, to hold on to the memories and the words that was given to us. To be able to do both of those things allows us to live from the past and to build us up but also the live in the present with these great moments that gives us the hope to sustain us for the future. Simmone, do you have anything to add to that? I just love everything he said 'cause holding on to those loved ones is what counts but I would also advise anybody that's grieving to reach out for help which we mentioned earlier. There is help available, there grief groups online, there are therapists that you can work with, there are even some family members in your family that are also grieving that you may not know about 'cause you didn't open that window, and so I say just keep that window open a little bit and yell out, "I need help", and somebody will probably answer the call. I see. Let's take another question from people that are watching. Are you finding that parents are listening to and finding a therapist for their children struggling with the disruptions in their lives that have been caused by coronavirus? Kids are out of school, they've been home all the time and it's having an impact on children too. What can we tell the parents who are worried? I think this is somewhat, I mean, to a certain sense of blessing for parents to be able to spend this type of quality time with their children. So I think it's important that parents don't look at it through the lens of spending more time to nurture your seed. Sit down and talk and have real conversation with your children. Read a book to your children. Don't put them in front of a TV. Take the phone from them. Reading a book is very nurturing. It's very comforting for you to hold your child and read a book to him or let him sit around you and they can touch you, lay on you, read the book 'cause that's part of when we talk about grieving love is a very healing attribute. Love is a very nurturing attribute as it relates to the touch, the feels, the hugs, the kisses on the forehead, the kisses on the cheek, to be told that I love you, I want the best for you. A lot of times parents don't get the time to do that. So I think looking at it through the lens of once again from a different perspective, to take this time to spend that quality time with your children and once again that is very helpful in these times. Let me pose another question that we've gotten from the people who are watching and this is one that I think all of us mothers can relate to. I know there are resources out there to help individuals, however, Black mothers are suffering. They're worried that their sons are going to come home after going to the mall, or going to the school, or going to the store. Are there support groups that will help those mothers deal with these concerns? I don't know of any specific support. I don't maybe the other panelists do what I do know that our community hubs, we talk about that all the time and we talked about it prior to George Floyd's death, because there were many before them and we know brutality, police brutality and specifically, it's not only about the death of someone, but being pulled over, race profiling, being talked to the wrong way, brutality from educators in school systems, brutality from neighbors or people in the community. So brutality looks different ways from sexual abuse to domestic abuse, whatever. So the brutality that is surrounding our Black children and our Black boys is alarming, it's alarming. So for the mothers who are worried, I would say please don't stay there waiting alone and worrying alone, reach out for help and hopefully we'll be able to add some resources later to give some people some information on how they can at least talk through that 'cause that's something that I don't know if we will have an opportunity to stop talking about. I know that we have often talked about giving our children the talk, telling them what they should do if something happens to them when they were out of the house. Should we continue to give them the talk? I don't see how we can't continue to give the talk, but I think the talk has to be altered so that we also as parents can hear and I know when I took the opportunity to hear from my son and my daughter, there's no way that happens too because they are able to bring some consciousness to me and some new information and new insight to me but I also give them some wisdom that they don't already have. So I don't think that we're gonna get away from having the talk until this society this America, this planet changes the way that it views Black men in particular, and Black people. You've talked about the hubs and Dr. Smith talked about the hubs. A viewer asked, are there any resources or virtual hubs that we can use to help us get through this safely? I don't know, specifically, no, but I do know that Arnitta may know some hubs or Dr. Watkins, or Dr. Ramel Smith may know some hubs, virtual hubs. As of right now, I don't know nay. Anyone else, are there any? If that question I would like to get something started, let us know. Maybe, maybe that's the answer. Maybe that's the answer, let us know, let's do it. So that's something that among therapists that we've been having conversation about and I've connected with other therapists in Madison and so we've been talking about how do we create those spaces for people, and so right now there may be virtual groups, but I don't know of any that are existing specifically for that. If we're talking back to grief, the Southeastern Grief Network has a ton of programs and support groups and I would imagine that they're doing some of those virtually, but we're in the process of shaping and creating some local, virtual groups. I was gonna say Alfonzo, does that sounds like a good idea to you? Try and create something? Yes, I am a representative of the Sankofa Elders Council here in Milwaukee. I mean, it's a new group but we've been working together, we're in the process of creating a rite of passage program for males and females. So this is something we're gonna introduce to the community very soon, so that we can have support groups for young brothers and sisters as they're transitioning through these critical stages of their development, but also another critical component is helping our Black families understand how do we began to build the resilience of our children during these critical stages of development. So once again, this is something that we're working on to introduce to the black community to help with this crisis that we're seeing down the coping mechanisms to navigate through this destruction and institutional racism. Here's another question from one of our viewers and I think Dr. Smith, maybe you can take this one. What can we do to combat the feeling of helplessness? That's a hard question, because we can give like a politically correct answer but the real question becomes like, what do I do that can give me immediate relief? And the first thing I wanna tell people is this, if you wake up with breath in your body and you wake up with a conscious mind to be able to think that's the first thing we have to recognize is that if I have breath, I have hope, and then what we've talked about all throughout this program, there is a resiliency within our people. When we look at what happened in 1619, we can say that we're nowhere where we need to be, but we've come so far away. So if we can activate that cellular DNA of hope, of courage, of strength for our people, and not only think about ourselves, but our posterity, our future generation that gives you the hope. I think about what if Queen Harry wouldn't have did what she did? Or brother Malcolm, or brother Mega, brother Maren had given up, where would we be? But it was because of the resilience, because of the strength of those individuals, where they didn't just think about themselves but they thought about those who came before them. So I tell everybody, when you have that sense of helplessness, put your eyes back on to the past of the people who came before you and oftentimes not to shame anyone, but I say what would your ancestors say to you with that? They would say rest, because I know it's tough baby, but also, let me touch you and let me bless you and kiss you with the spirit of hope and the strength to be able to carry on when you cease, there's nothing into you to carry on. In psychology, we talk about the power of positive thinking and it's not just something that's wishful and whimsical, it's a cognitive restructuring of these new runs that make us believe it. So the more you say it, the it more becomes true and the more things come true and it manifest, the more it validates that you do have a power that you didn't think you originally had. I'd like to add to that too and just talk about what Dr. Kweku mentioned, also waking up with that breath and that concept that I can think, lay in the bed and start thinking about what you are grateful for in that moment, and that sometime can trigger that brain synapses to say, hey, there's some hopelessness but on the other side, I am grateful for shelter and breath, and a new day and a new opportunity, and with this, I will do fill in the blank and sometimes the action of your feet, giving back to others, volunteering, volunteering in your community, or in your home or wherever, that helps that helplessness when you start being active, evenly talking back to the helplessness. I love all of that. Everything Dr. Kweku and Simmone just said is amazing. Another thing to add to that would be, focus on what you can control, because we get lost in what we can't control and that's what makes us feel helpless. There's nothing too trivial, nothing too small or minuscule, if you can control which pair of shoes you put on today, focus on what you're able to control that. You may not be able to go out and buy a five course meal, but I got some chicken wings and some hamburger meat, I'm gonna choose the hamburger meat today and make sloppy joe, that was a choice that you made and you controlled it, and so you can build on that and as you build on that you start to that locus of controlling our sense of what we're able to control or not starts to build and it reduces the hopelessness, the helplessness. I Totally agree with that. I decided the other day that I was gonna wash all the dishes in my sink and when I got them finished, I felt great. (panelists laughing) So let's have everybody give us a short wrap up, some thoughts about some things you want folks to take with us when we leave each other this evening. Let's start with Simmone. Okay, I was just thinking as you said that and going back to being grateful. We are in a horrible pandemic and we don't know really, there's uncertainty. If we use the word pandemic, we need to understand that people are afraid of uncertainty like Arnitta was talking about that control. It's too much uncertainty going on in the world. So we're all really afraid and so mindfulness as a practice, and being in the moment. Right now I'm breathing, right now I'm safe, right now I'm happy, right now I have access to all of the basic needs that need. So not trying to figure out what next year is going to look like, 'cause clearly we have no idea. So I just like to leave everybody with the idea of looking up and looking into or googling what mindfulness and being in the moment is, and again, we took a class this morning on self-compassion. Be kind to yourself, love on yourself, wrap your arms around yourself and squeeze tightly and say, "I am enough and I'm worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy." Thank you, Alfonzo what are your final thoughts? And once again, I'm gonna speak from a collective perspective. My experience with working and living here in Milwaukee, with Milwaukee being one of the worst places for African American family to be in, to be raised in, I'm requesting that our European family, that y'all get to a place where y'all can recognize that we are victims of environmental and social conditions that we did not create. These conditions that we live in are the conditions that we are being forced to live in. So I would like for leadership to meet with Black leadership and let's have a real conversation about what is needed to change the conditions of the inner city of Milwaukee, and what policies needs to be changed, what legislation needs to be changed? What discriminatory loaning practices that have impacted the African American where we don't get access to loans to take care of our properties? We need to have some conversations about what type of manufacturing and industry jobs that can be brought to the city Milwaukee where black men can be employed, so they can take care of their families. So I would like for us to start having some real conversation with those who are ready to have a transition of not giving up to power but just sharing the power or access to the resources. Arnitta, a thought to leave us with. Yeah, that was great stuff. I'd say, just remember you're not alone, that you are not in this alone. Give yourself some grace. Take rest and breaks as you need to and I also like to remind people that everything we do and we are, all of that is connected to relationship and everything we need is connected to relationship and so our relationships with our close others, with our family, our friends, our larger community, stay connected to folks that love you, that care for you and that will hold you up when you're having a difficult time. And Dr. Smith, we're gonna give you the final word. What is the word? Two words, self and others, take care of yourself, the small things that we can control, how we eat, how we exercise and getting proper sleep, and then others, and I say this every time, every place I go, Mama Daisy always told me, the best way to heal yourself is to help others. So when we see these young babies out in the streets and they're fighting, let's give them some love. Let's do some things we can do to pour into them positively. Think about more than just yourself but make sure you take care of yourself so you can take care of others. Great words to take forward. Thank you all very much for joining us tonight. I thank the panelists, and I thank you folks who are watching, I hope you got some inspiration from this conversation. I hope it was helpful and I hope it was enlightening. For "Black Nouveau" and Milwaukee PBS, thanks for joining us am Joanne Williams, good night. (upbeat music)